Power of NOW

OK - Let's answer this a bit at a time.

" ... focusing on how I want it to be. How about focusing nice things that he used to to (more), since he did some things much more in the beginning of our relationship ;-)? Is it okay to say "I fondly remember when x called me frequently" or " ...when he brought me those pretty flowers" or "...when he took me out to dance" etc. because it feels good when he shows me his affection?

Or should I only phrase it like this "I see x calling me more often", "...taking me out to" etc? Then of course the "wouldnt it be nice if method, like "wouldn't it be nice if he called me more often...". Speaking of calling "more often" - now I wonder if this is focusing on lack of not calling enough? :-)"

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It doesn't matter ... but Which feels better to you? As you try out different methods of visualising, be in touch with what type of emotions you feel.

It doesn't matter if you focus on a past event that makes you happy, a present event that makes you happy or a potential (imaginary) event that makes you happy. Happiness is what you are looking to achieve. The method of getting there is your choice.

Whatever you are focusing on NOW, whether it is in the past or imaginary IS your point of attraction. That's why many say "Your power is in the NOW" .. And it is :-)

On to the next point:
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"Lastly, I would love to hear your general thoughts on men and women playing traditionally different roles. I have read many times that men are the persuers and women are to be persued, men should do the calling, men need to be the care takers, etc. How does this relate to LOA??"

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We are all unique and if we can disregard what is taught as fact, then we get more in touch with what each one of us as an individual feels better doing in any situation.

It is true there are hormones and history that suggests that men are more likely to be the persuer .. I can see my male dogs in action, and that seems true. But I also see that this is not always true.

This is a world of contrast. That means, each and every day, we see what we don't like and what we do like. Each person sees it from their own perspective.

For example, if a man has been the persuer for a while and he gets fed up with doing that because of some negative experiences, he may launch a desire to be persued. He may want it very much for women to start taking a more active role in persuing him!

Also, it works the other way round. A woman might also launch a desire to persue men of her choice. Perhaps she has discovered that when she is persued she gets the wrong type of men ... and actively changes direction because she feels she has a clearer idea on the type of men she wants in her life.

And there are many who are quite happy in the traditional relationships, because that is what they believe is right for them.

There is no right and wrong with this. It is the contrast (what we don't like versus what we do like) that we are living that creates new desires and new ways of being.

Some beliefs are so grounded in society, that even though there is a desire for change, it takes the next generation to live it.

For example, most of my generation (I'm 44) are still caught in the man persuer-woman persued dynamics.

But in my kids generation, seems that girls are often the persuers. Both my teenage sons first girlfriends asked them out! So it seems they are living out the last generations desires, ... because they are less resistant to change, they can live it.

On to the next question:-)
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"I guess what I wanna know is, does one have to worry about EMASCULATING a man that way? What I was thinking is, I would like say to hubby for example maybe "I would love it if you would go see a movie or movie x with me sometimes", all with positive vibes, so if he says no, or says maybe but doesnt follow up its okay also :-)"

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You get what you focus on. If you focus on seeming like a man, you will feel it. If you focus on asking him out because it's enjoyable to do so, then it will be.

If you had a casual male friend, this would not be a problem would it?

On to the next :-)
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"Also, how about telling him when he does something I like, for example if he calls me just to see how Im doing, that I love when he does so? That way instead of just visualizing him doing it (or more of it), lead things in this direction a little more actively WITHOUT demanding anything? Of course sparingly :-)"

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Sounds great. Others are influenced by our focusing on what we like about them.

I know my sons spirits are lifted when I say stuff like "I really love the way you were organised for school today" .. "I was so proud to see you help your brother with his homework" ... "You're clever, I know you can be anything you want" .. "I appreciate you helping me in the garden, it was generous of you to do that" etc.

So, congratulating others for their achivements, focusing only on behaviour you like, telling them how they make you feel good just by them being themselves is wonderful.

Don't you love it when others say who you are and what you are makes them feel good? :-)

Of course, you feeling good is up to you, but others helping you do that is immensely helpful too.