By the way, it's interesting that you've had a very positive experience in the beginning too. So did Mark Vonnegut who has described his journey to recovery from insanity in his very good book 'The Eden Express'.
This possibly confirms what boldyloxx is saying, that there are forces of darkness that pray on people on the way to spiritual awakening, perhaps even enhancing the good experience by feeding the cravings of the ego to lure the victim into their web.