Hi, once again and I would like to thank everyone who has written. You all have such words of wisdom. There is a lot of truth in some of what you speak Pb3046. I'm very glad I turned to this forum for advice. Sometimes when one is in the middle of an emotional situation, it is hard to see the forest for the trees. I'm thinking a whole lot clearer. My number one obligation is to my children the youngest being 10. I have to see him grown and that means 8 years. I do need to make it the best marriage it can be, regardless of what happens after the 8 years. So this would be the time to focus 100% on the marriage. Some of Dr Phil's advice resinates in my ears all the time.
"You have to do the work to earn your way out of a Marriage" and "You cannot fix a marriage by looking outside of the marriage".