This question is asked tons of times of Ellen Kreidman.  She generally says to stay with your husband and work on the marriage.  She says everyone has things you will not like that you will find out later, they are just different things than your previous mate if you try to go to greener pastures.  And, she has a program for saving your marriage that she guarantees.  She has a free newsletter that is good, too.  There are also audio samples on her site.

http://www.lightyourfire.com/women.htm

ABOUT DR. ELLEN For the past 23 years, Dr. Ellen has been hired as a keynote speaker to educate, motivate, and inspire thousands of men and women on how to put fun, romance, excitement and communication in their relationships. Through humor and personal experiences, she is able to captivate and relate to any type of audience, the dynamics of building a solid foundation for a more rewarding life. Through her audio cassettes, CD's, seminars and books she has been teaching and communicating her message to men and women of all ages throughout the world. All of her efforts are designed to work together to achieve one ultimate goal: strengthen the fun, love and communication between two people. She has been happily married for 36 years and has three grown children and four grandchildren.

The following are her accomplishments:

AUTHOR - "Light His Fire," published in August of 1989, became a New York Times best seller. National appearances on television and radio introduced an entire nation to the "Light His Fire" philosophy. The follow-up title, "Light Her Fire," published in February 1991, hit #1 on the New York Times best seller list. In 1993, Dr. Ellen wrote "Is There Sex After Kids?" and in 1998 "The Ten Second Kiss." Over one million copies of Dr. Ellen's books have been sold. Her latest book title is "Single No More - How and Where to Meet Your Perfect Mate." She has been a featured guest on Oprah, Sally, Montel, Maury, The Today Show and Barbara Walters, "The View."

This program will work if:

You are on the verge of divorce and want to save your marriage You can't get your man to commit Your mate has said, "I love you but I'm no longer in love with you." One or both of you have lost interest in sex Your relationship is beginning to crumble and you want to turn it completely around You want to laugh, have fun and enjoy each other's company You want to communicate on a deeper level You are nervous about starting a new relationship because you are not sure of what to do You would like to captivate and mesmerize a man for the rest of his life

Women who have been through Dr. Ellen's, "Light His Fire," program have learned that they do not have to settle for a relationship that lacks communication, closeness and romance. You will learn how to have a love affair with your mate for the rest of your life because as Dr. Ellen says, "If you don't, someone else will." By following her advice, women have exchanged monotonous and routine relationships for moonlight walks on the beach, romantic candlelight dinners, hugs, kisses and many other surprises. If you are not in a relationship, this program will give you the confidence to attract men to you like a magnet. Your Prince Charming, or Knight in Shining Armor, is either right by your side or standing close by just waiting to be discovered. It is possible to live happily ever after. It can happen to you!

Quotes from women who have completed the "Light His Fire" Program:

My husband announced, "I don't love you anymore. I want a divorce." The next day I saw you on TV and ordered your program. I was determined to make every last effort to win my husband back and have him fall in love with me again. I hesitantly began doing the homework assignments in the process of winning his heart again. That was just over a year ago today. Just the other day this same husband took me in his arms and whispered, "What does it feel like to still be honeymooning after all these years?" - Janet R.

I am 35 years old and have 2 children ages 10 and 12 years old. We had been married for 14 years and were definitely headed for divorce. Things seemed so hopeless and not worth the effort. My husband was cold, selfish and there was no romance in our marriage. I followed your program step by step, doing everything you said. I just wanted to write you and tell you it all worked. By the way, the night my husband and I made passionate love by candlelight, we made a baby. I'm pregnant. Beautiful things can happen and I owe it all to you. - Susan T.

My fiancée told me he had changed his mind and didn't want to get married. I listened to the first two CD's, did the first chapter in the workbook and then told my fiancée exactly what you told me to say. He is now calling me every night, sends me emails every day to say "I love you", and last night told me that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. This is so truly amazing!!!!! I never thought that something you said could change your whole life. Thanks for giving me the right words. Barbara M.

I honestly thought that my lack of sexual interest was due to the onset of menopause (forty-seven years old). This however, is not so, and you have proven it. I recently ordered your program and I must tell you that after listening to tape #4, my husband and I had a night that made us both feel as if we were twenty-year-old newlyweds. - Linda P.

My husband purchased both the "Light His Fire" and "Light Her Fire" programs several years ago. It has pulled us through everything from deaths in the family to extramarital affairs. To this day, whenever we start growing apart, we listen to them again and enjoy them more every time. We are 41 and have been married for 23 years. We were married before we were out of high school. Everyone said our marriage would never last. Thanks to you we did. Just the sound of your voice inspires hope. Thanks for being there!! - Vera H.

http://www.lightyourfire.com/products_ind.cfm?catid=4

A Tunnel Without Cheese

Ellen Kreidman

If you put a rat in front of a bunch of tunnels and put cheese in one of them, the rat will go up and down the tunnels looking for the cheese. If every time you do the experiment you put the cheese down the fourth tunnel, eventually, you'll get a successful rat. This rat knows the right tunnel and goes directly to it every time.

If you move the cheese out of the fourth tunnel and put it at the end of another tunnel, the rat still goes down the fourth tunnel. And, of course, gets no cheese. He then comes out of the tunnel, looks the tunnel over, and goes right back down the cheeseless fourth tunnel. Unrewarded, he comes out of the tunnel, looks the tunnels over again, goes back down the fourth tunnel again, and again finds no cheese.

Now the difference between a rat and a human being is that eventually the rat will stop going down the fourth tunnel and will go look down the other tunnels, and a human being will go down the tunnel with no cheese forever. Rats, you see, are only interested in cheese. But human beings care more about going down the right tunnel.

It is belief which allows human beings to go down the fourth tunnel ad nauseum. They go on doing what they do without any real satisfaction, without any nurturing, because they come to believe that what they are doing is RIGHT. And they will do this forever, even if there is no cheese in the tunnel, as long as they believe in it and can prove that they are in the right tunnel.