Good morning, John,

I very much like that you admit to some cockiness. Good for you! You do have reason, and the humility to admit to a mistake. That may be your saving grace...the asset that will pull you through.


I think you've got a good dose of reality...alcohol poisoning.

You are lucky it didn't kill you.

And I don't doubt for one minute that you'll never be able to drink it again without sickening yourself, perhaps much worse than these past few months.


Why were you drinking at all?


Who are these 'Irish' you were trying to keep up with? Are they connected to your school life?


The exuberance of youth (raging hormones and a sense of invincibility) has led you down the garden path, made you believe you can do anything...like stay up all night, every night...eat anything, especially stimulants...occupy yourself with time-wasting video games, no, one video game...and still think you can do schoolwork and become a lawyer.

Nope!

You can't.

Now you must choose...just like all the rest of us.


You say you have been doing all this since you were 15? ...Six years? ...Not only six years, but six of the most important formative years of your life? ...And anti- Depression meds before that?

Gad, you are strong!!!

Now let's see if you are strong enough to turn this around!


First, who is taking care of you?

No...FIRST...what are you thinking?

Within a few short months you have seen a complete turnaround in your thinking/feeling. You know for a fact that can be done, and YOU can do it.

A complete change for the worse is exactly the same as a complete change for the better...the only difference is the end result you achieve...sickness or health.

And it IS your choice...yours alone.


Every thought you think is a command that your inner person MUST believe, and serve.

You think you want to return to the social life you thought you were joining? Bingo! That's what your body is trying to do! Keep you alive with the sole goal of doing it all over again!

I know, you think you will be more moderate, a 'social' drinker, etc. But you have just PROVEN that you can't handle it. It was this 'social' notion that led you to sickness!

Think again!

You don't LIKE this cleansing illness, remember?!

And this is just a SAMPLE of what lies ahead if you try to return to 'social' drinking, and the 'high' life. There is no 'middle' or 'moderate' path for you.


Don't believe me?

Join Alcoholics Anonymous, and ask others who have been through it.

Take a few copies of your story, and pass them to folks who are kind enough to help. Give them each a highlighter pen, and ask them to mark the symptoms they have experienced, themselves.

Leave your cockiness at home that day. Only your humility will do you any good. Ask alcoholics if you are one...a person so sensitive, so tender-hearted, that ANY amount of alcohol will set them to binging.


I knew a couple where the man was very kind, very 'social', a hard worker, a loving father, and an alcoholic.

His wife tried to bear it, even joining him in his bar life while neglecting the needs of her children, for a while.

Then one day the husband came home to find his wife in the living room, taking down the curtains. Her bags were packed and standing in the middle of the room.

Immediately the man protested...he would change, he would beat this...please, please, please don't leave me! (All of which she had heard before, of course.)

So, she didn't. But those suitcases sat in the middle of the living room for three months.

Somehow they moved back to the small town he had grown up in.

One day a friend saw Jim kind of hiding behind a telephone pole. The friend asked him what he was doing.

This is the conversation as Jim told it to me...

Jim: "Well, I didn't want people to see me going to an AA meeting."

Friend: "You didn't mind when people saw you falling down drunk!"

Pause.

Jim: "You're right!"

And he never hid his membership in AA again. In fact, he became a true help to many others...not just alcoholics. He was proud of his accomplishment, but always quite quiet about it. He knew how easy it was to drift into illness.

Which isn't to say that getting out of it was easy for Jim.

He told me of one night he took a shotgun down to the river...and how he stood there, where he had been a boy, for a long, long time. ...And decided NOT to. He would face healing, however hard it got, and see if he could do that, instead.

Later, if it got too difficult, if he really couldn't change, there was always the easy way out.

I felt privileged when Jim told me his story. He was sharing how he saved his own life. He told it to others, too...to help them.

I'm sure Jim would be glad that I am passing his story on. He died a few years ago, after enjoying a much longer life than he had once expected.

I also had the privilege of hearing his wife's side of the story. Her one outstanding comment that I will never forget was, "Sensitive? The bars are full of sensitive people! That's why they are there!"


I think what you need is a rest...a LOT of rest...and rest from all the things that have been sapping and taxing your energy for six, and more, years.

I think you need to enfold and pamper John...treat him with the greatest respect and kindness...listen to his real needs, the ones he hears from within.

John is one smart cookie...and attractive. He states his case clearly and honestly. People feel they can relate to him...they like him. And John has a glowing future ahead. He knows it, too...else he'd never have come here to ask questions.


Now we come to the SECOND question...who has been taking care of you?

Who has been nurturing you, feeding you well, enfolding you, and providing the steadiness that allowed you to go out and explore the world and study?

Immediately, thank them...even if you have thanked them before, do it again. Reward them.

And thank the ones online who kept you interested, entertained, and thoughtful. (Blanket the lot, thank everyone as a group...so you don't leave anyone out.)


Then, pull together your team of supporters...the ones you'll need to heal yourself, and plan for your happy future.


...Realizing, of course, that the two groups, supporters and nurturers from the past and those who will help you heal from this day forward, may not contain any of the same people.


Healing is your job, with appropriate supporters a close second.

Now you get to enjoy the adventure of true adulthood and self-determination...saving and guiding your own life.

However, as many healthy adults will tell you, the journey is neither easy nor brief. But it is oh so worth the effort!


Think of this...

Think of the eyes and unconditional love and respect of your children you have so carefully and gently raised. They will adore you, and appreciate your wisdom. They will be born that way. And think of their children, your grandbabies.


Jerry Lewis once put a gun in his mouth, you know. He was sick from a certain pill he was addicted to.

Locked in his office, he heard his children running down the hall, and he couldn't use his gun.

That was the beginning of the rest of his life.


This is the beginning of the rest of yours.

You'll do just fine, John. Trust yourself...you are smarter than you think.

And laugh a lot...laughter is healing...and a lot more fun than anything else you can think of.

My very, very best.

Fledgling

If you are contemplating suicide, then whatever trouble you said that you overcame, was not real overcoming but just another illusion. And illusions are dangerous. Overcoming makes one stronger, not weaker. Contemplating suicide is a sign of weakness.

Your negative thoughts are effects of whatever infection you have. They are not "you". So don't follow up on something that is not "you". It's like doing something stupid while on drugs and then regretting it later.

Accept the fact that you are not omni-potent, and that bad things do happen to us. Then observe your problems, try to find out their causes and then deal with them the best that you can.

Personally, I think you contracted more then one type of parasite (if you have a fungal infection too, it is not surprising but probably not the root cause). Your drinking the day earlier weakened your immune system, and left it open to who knows what. Sushi almost always has some parasites, as does most of the restaurant food, especially if you live in a warmer climate area (like Texas, Florida, California, New Mexico etc).

I would start with a GI profile test at
http://www.metametrix.com
and see what they come up with. Genova labs is another place although for parasites they are less reliable. Then if they find any parasites (they'll probably find protozoa) come to parasites forum. (if your MD doesn't cooperate, find a new one, and keep changing them until you find a good one)

BTW, you need to stop taking any alcohol for the rest of your life, except for an occasional glass of red wine. Or better yet - stay away from it all together.

There is more to life then you thought, and you are learning about that as you go. As a matter of fact, suicidal thoughts and dreams of dying, are often symbols of our own outgrowing of our old selves. Same as a child outgrowing his clothes, you are outgrowing your ego.

In your quest for health you are just learning that maybe your value system was a little "off". What did you value the most before June 6? What do you value the most now? See anything different? That's the begining of humbleness. Nothing happens by accident; wise people know this very well. Choose wisdom. Use this situation, your inteligence and humbleness to gain wisdom. Then you will never want the clock to turn back to before June 6.

Personally I really believe people attribute Candida to health problems way to often when it has nothing to do with their problem. In your case though I would definitely say that you have a classica case of yeast overgrowth. For instance the tongue coating and sour taste. The coating sounds like thrush, and the sour taste would be the acids created by the yeast. Things like the burping, gas, and reflux are also attributable to yeast overgrowth as the yeast ferments sugars creating carbon dioxide gas. The sinus drainage could also be a sinus infection, which are most often fungal. Doctors rarely do cultures though before prescribing Antibiotics , and this can really aggrevate fungal infecitons by killing off beneficial bacteria that normally help keep fungus under control. Many of your other symptoms also fit Candida, as well as other problems. The primary symptoms though that I have already addressed point to the rest of the symptoms likely to be from the Candida as well.

Stress can aggrevate Candida because stress weakens the immune response, which is a primary cause of Candida in the first place. People all too often try to treat Candida by trying to kill it, which does not work. Candida is a normal part of the body, but is normally kept in check by the immune system. If the immune system is down the Candida can take over creating problems. Killing the Candida just creates more food for the surviving Candida creating rebound reactions. The trick to getting Candida back under control is to get the immune system back in charge. Pro and prebiotics and adaptogenic herbs are good starts. Supplements like zinc (50mg daily) and natural sources of vitamin C (amla, berries, kiwis, watercresss, etc.)also go a long way to helping.

In addition I highly recommend 1000mg TMG (trimethylglycine) 3 to 4 times daily. It is an extremely safe supplement. TMG is a powerful methyl donor. As a methyl donor TMG helps among other things to build up all of your neurotransmitters and hormones, both of which can affect mood. It also helps to increase digestive secretions, in particular stomach acid. This is extremely important as Candida thrives in an alkaline environment, as do the majority of pathogenic microbes, but is killed by high acid levels. This is one of the ways that the benefical flora control yeast. They generate lactic and acetic acids that kill yeast. This is also why we tend to develop more heartburn as we grow older. As we age our stomach acid levels decline leading to a more alkaline environment in the stomach. This can lead to fermentation in the stomach from yeast overgrowth and improper digestion of foods. The resulting gas formation puts pressure on the sphincter muscles in the stomach. When they tire out from the pressure and give way the gas rushes up the esophagus carrying traces of acid with it leading to the heartburn. Antacids and acid blockers just contribute to the problem and create other problems such as microbial infections and nutritional deficiencies as acid is required to kill pathogens, and to absorb vitamins and minerals and to digest proteins.

I recommend starting there then report back to see if other issues may have to be addressed such as adrneal or thymus dysfunction.

Also have your throat checked. The white spots on the tonsils sounds like strep thoat. Pau d' arco tea is great for this. Just remember to rapidly boil the bark for at least 20 minutes. Do not steep the bark as it will not extract properly. The tea should be drunk throuhgout the day and continued for at least several days after symptoms dissapear.

water fasting will help with your symptoms of depression, anxiety, and probably fix your body of what going on with it. that thick furry tongue is a sign your body is very toxic. drink nothing but good water for some time, and most of all get away from the drugs they are giving you.

Sounds like you have some type of baceria or parasites in the intestines. It's only a matter of time before you find out what will work for you. I would start with Lugols Iodine Supplementation and or Miracle-Mineral-Supplement .

I am glad to see that you got so much informaton on parasites. As I read you post, that is the first thing I thought of.

I would like to share with you a remedy for them that I have used periodically for years. Just call Yerba Mex at (714) 647-9432 (Santa Ana, California) and ask for their parasite tea. For about $12.00 they will send you more then enough to take care of the problem, although parasite cleasning should go on periodically throughout your life. If you don't speak spanish, they will connect you with someone who speaks English).

You just brew the tea and drink it several times a day for a week...wait two weeks and then do it again. It rids you every kind of parasite there is.

You should feel signifcant relief after your first glass, even if parasites are not the entire cause of your problem. (We all have em.)

Make sure you use some probotics when you are finished.

we are all given live challenges, thats the reason we are here, our soul purpose. you are a strong person so you can deal with this. its crap I know but you only have to look through cure zone to realize there are a lot of people with serious health problems. when you have dealt with your problems you will make the world a better place because then you will be interested in helping other people, it made you more caring and compassionate.
first of all you need to detox your body of metals, parsites etc that is where all ill health starts. then your body will get well.
dont let my spiritual advice put you of healing ,if you are not spiritual open your mind and read up on it ,it makes sense.
jo

Hey I totally feel you. I am 20 years old and all my life i've felt kind of funny. I'm really anti-social and shy and nervous. But only recently have I had a UTI that i took Antibiotics for and couldn't get rid of. I was chewing gum (aspartame) because i noticed my breath would smell and then I noticed I was having stomach cramps and gurgling sounds. The doctors kept prescribing me more and more Antibiotics . My teeth started becoming really sensitive and I developed thrush. Then I lost my personality and I feel too nervous all the time and I cannot enjoy things the way I used to be before (which was actually quite minimally but whatever). I went from 112 pounds to 93 pounds. I really want to do a parasite cleanse, but first I'm doing this diet. I have been on it for a month...

I've been taking a lot of supplements. Especially for candida. I have coconut oil and pau d'arco and probiotics and Grapefruit-Seed-Extract and allicin(garlic extract). This is definitely not the only problem i have , but oh well. Going to see if all these things work and if not, I might have to try harder.

I do contemplate suicide a lot but it helps just calling up a friend when you feel that way. I don't know.

How are you doing?