Suicidal Tendencies and millions of dollars!?!?

Thank you for this amazing post, I really appreciate it. I would've emailed you privately but you didn't enable emails...if you want to email me privately, that is fine. I wanted to ask you: What antidepressant helped you? I have resisted for a long time because my significant other is totally against that stuff and I always believed everything was curable without DRUG help. But I am suicidal over these food issues. I go from fat to thin overnight, one day I am bony and look like I have cancer, the next day I am bloated and chubby. I feel like I can't win and I am starting to lose my drive to stay alive through this. I have been sick with mystery ailment for about 5-6 months. Before that, I was spiritual, strong, fasting, cleansing... what happened to me? Where did I go wrong?? I am so depressed and unmotivated and I am on the brink of total millionaire dollar success with my business ... am I scared of it for some reason? Anyone would be so happy, a few months away from lifelong financial freedom and I am doing everything I can to ruin it.... I wish I had a manager, someone who would boot me in the ass and say: DO IT DO IT DO IT, all day long. Does anyone want to be my manager and whip me to finish my work for a piece of the $$? I am dead serious.... so many smart people on curezone in jobs that are beneath them. I am in Southern California (where else?)and I am serious about a manager ... you must be good at reading and english and commited to this. I just can't do this alone ... I could hire a company to help me but they will take 50-80% of my profits. Which is still better than nothing isn't it?? What am I talking about? Nevermind...
Kris