Please ask her to read this site. I feel for you so much. I went on a downward spiral after having the IUD. I snapped at everyone, lost all get up and go, had no confidence or self interest and treated my boyfriend of almost 9 years like a dog! I was irrational, and even when i could see that i was being so i couldn't stop myself. I still loved him dearly but was so fatigued, withdrawn and miserable i had no desire for him. I too told him he'd be better off without me yet i knew i never wanted him to walk away from me. I saw sense and had it removed and haven't looked back since. Our relationship has gone from strength to strength and i am sure the same can come of yours with your wife. Ask her to e-mail me and i'll go through it with her. Keep looking up, i'm sure there is light at the end of the tunnel for you.