The first time I "came" was by complete accident.... my boyfriend and I were just lying in bed massaging each other's genitals, that's all. The prolonged soft massage of my clitoris made me cum. I have always come with massage of the clitoris, taking about 15 mins of constant circular massage... I have never cum with intercourse. You might like to try massaging your clit when you are alone, maybe use some lube as well, and keep going until you feel an unusual feeilng coming... at this point DO NOT STOP! Keep going.... and I'm sure you will reach cllmax. Its like a sneeze and totally unmistakenable. Good luck