What is time?

Help me here! What is time? Let me just postulate a few thoughts and see if anyone has to say anything about any of them.

Time is what makes the difference between the past and the future. The past is one path through all the decisions or outcomes that were possible before it became the past. The future is the set of all possible outcomes for everything that has not become the past.

Time is death.

Time is an illusion. But what is an illusion without time?

I don't believe time is real. Cause and effect are not real except for a certain scale, and then only approximately. Time seems like the essence of cause and effect to me. Time is not real. I am not real. I think, therefore I am? I don't think so. I don't know if I think. I don't even know if i exist. Personally i think i don't. These words are being written by a body controlled by thoughts, which are all (the body and the thoughts) mechanisms of my genes constructed by them to play the game of life (material life) for them. I may not be more than my body and mind, but i know that i am not equal to the totality of my body and mind. I know this only because i once experienced separation from my body and my thoughts.

Is it all just words? "I" is just a word. It might make just as little sense as politics or a motto.

Why would i care about anything? If time is not real, why would i care about anything? If death is not real, why would i care about anything?

I do not want to care about anything.

I do not want to want anything, nor to not want anything.

I can't die if i don't exist. Could all this be just my attempt to fool myself into ignoring my inborn fear of death? Who says people like Jesus didn't make just that very mistake?

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