i just don't understand anymore

I'm so seriously confused with my boyfriend these days. We've been together for almost 3 years now, and sometimes things are great but many times I just can't take anymore and I feel like breaking up with him.

In July I left for a month to visit family in Europe. Before that we were doing alright, some problems here and there but we got along. When I came back we tried to spend time together but with his long work schedule it was difficult. Now I've moved to LA in order to be closer to school and he's started going to night school. So now we hardly talk on the phone and never see each other in person. I am so used to talkign with him before I go to sleep or when I get home from classes.

He went away for the weekend to visit family and before he left we had gotten into an argument about our relationship. I asked him if he wanted to break up because he made it seem like he did. He said "I don't know", now what is that supposed to mean?? He then said that he doesn't want to but it sounds like I want to. So he basically turned it on me. I don't want to break up with him because we love each other a lot, but I don't know if I can trust him without my being here with him. He's been known to hang out with girls younger than he is, and he's gotten in trouble with his boss for this a couple of times. He and I started dating when I was 17 and he was 6 years older than me.

Any time I ask him about whether he's seeing someone else or if he's intersted in anyone else he always tells me the same thing "Why would I want someone else when I have you... Why would I do something to jeopardize our relationship when you know I love you." He's said this so many times but I just don't know who he hangs out with or what he's doing. He has girls phone numbers in his address book and when I ask him about who they are he takes some time to think about the answer before answering me. So it seems like something fishy is going on.

I really need help about what I should do. I'm young and I don't want to be married, I want to experience other relationships and new things in college. He's already passed through it all and he's at the stage where he is ready to get married. I've already told him that I can see us getting married later down the line but not now. I don't know what else to do because I love him and I don't want to lose him. Tweet