Jews are God's chosen people from the beginning and Gentiles were grafted in. You are acceptable to God and dearly loved. The bible states in 'the end' that the door will be closed to Gentiles but remain for Jews to accept Jesus Christ for a time as the one who is the lamb who shed blood for all men. I know many Messianic Jews. If you would like to talk with them, let me know and I will send you their email address privately. My email is posted above.