Very Long and Complicated

Where do I start? I guess the best place would be is that I met my husband at a young age and he was the first man to take any interest in me at all. Due to this, I fell in love quickly and we were married by the age of 18. I was very happy until I met this other guy nearly two years ago. We got friendly and fell in love - and it was like something I have never felt before. We connected on every level and I don't think I will ever experience a love like that again. I worshipped him - and still do. Unfortunately, we were both married and it is now no more than casual sex (a fact that hurts me but I still love him and can't help myself). The thing is, it has lead me to question my relationship with my husband, I compare them and I don't feel sexually attracted to my husband anymore, there are things he does that drives me crazy that I never knew about before. I do still love him and I know he is a great husband who I can trust and spend the rest of my life with, he's be a great father too when the time is right. But, how can I spend my life with a man who I don't want to make love to, don't connect on all or many levels and know that maybe it isn't love but something that I am holding onto for companionship and loyalty and because I'm scared that I might be making a mistake if I leave to find something else. This is so hard it is tearing me apart. Do I stay with my husband who any women would die for (husband material wise) or leave and look for true love again with someone who I might never find? Help!
Tweet