I Mean Business Here!

The first question:

  Question 1:

Hamid, the problem is that man is NOT a river, man is very much frozen. There is no flow in man's being. Man is like ice, not like water. If man is a river, there is no need to push it, it will reach ultimately to the ocean. It HAS already reached: in that very flow it has become part of the ocean. To be flowing is to be oceanic.

But man is not flowing, hence the urge. The ice wants to melt, hence the effort. Once the ice has melted, then there is no need to push anything, then everything happens of its own accord.

Man has become a rock. And the reason why man has become a non-flowing rock is the Mind. The body is perfectly flowing, so is the soul. But between the two, the link, the mind, is frozen ice. Once the mind goes deeper into meditation it starts melting. That's what meditation is all about: an effort to melt the mind.

You say:

That's true, but first become a river.

You say:

True, but between the body and the soul there is a mind clinging to you, or you clinging to it. The body goes, but you don't become the infinite because you are not only surrounded by a body - that is your physical limitation - there is psychological limitation inside it. Through the death of the body, mind will not die, it will take rebirth. It will move into another womb, because it will carry so many desires which are to be fulfilled. It will again seek another womb, another body with which to fulfil those desires. That is the very foundation of the theory of reincarnation.

Mind desires, and if desires are there, then opportunities will arise in which those desires will be fulfilled. God cooperates with you. If you have desires like a dog, you will become a dog, you will have the body of a dog. Your mind creates the blueprint, and then the body follows. The body is a projection of the mind, not vice versa. Unless mind disappears completely you will be born again and again. Once the mind is gone, then it is perfectly true, Hamid: the body disappears and you are the infinite. In fact, if the mind is not there, you are the infinite without the disappearance of the body, without the death of the body. There is no need to wait for that.

Buddha is infinite even when he is in the body because he knows he is not the body. Buddha is infinite when he leaves the body. There is no difference for him: living in the body or leaving the body is the same. You live in a house, but you don't think that you are the house. Exactly like that, an awakened consciousness lives in the body; it uses the body just as you use a car. You sit in the car, you drive the car; you know that you are not the car. You can get out of it any moment. You need not wait for an accident to happen when the car is destroyed to feel that you are not the car.

And if you don't know it when the car is there and you are in it, how are you going to know it when the car is not there? Just through the death of the body, you will not know that you are infinite. Either you are infinite herenow, or you will never be. Infinity is your nature.

The real problem is not the body. The body is not the culprit as the so-called religions have been telling you, 'The body is the culprit!' The body is not the culprit at all. The body is utterly innocent and beautiful. The culprit is the mind, the MIND IS the devil. You will have to dissolve the mind, hence the urge, hence the purpose of all the methodologies that have been developed down the ages: Tao, Yoga, Tantra, Zen, Hassidism.

Become a river and then nothing is needed. That's what THE SECRET OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER says: Achieve inaction through action, achieve effortlessness through effort. But first comes the effort, the action. It will melt you, and then the river starts flowing. In that very flow it has reached the ocean.

The second question:

Question 2:

Sagarpriya, the ego is neither male nor female. The ego is simply the ego. The one who becomes resistant to the male ego is the female ego. You are aware of the male ego, but you are not aware of your own ego. Who is resistant to surrender?

Become more aware of your own ego, and then things will be easier. Everybody is aware of the ego of the other, but nothing can be done about the ego of the other. All that can be done is only with yourself.

You say:

Who is this who finds it almost impossible? Find out! And then you will be surprised: ego is ego; it is neither male nor female. Don't divide it. Egos have no sex, no gender; it is the same disease. If a woman has cancer, it is cancer. If a man has cancer, it is cancer. It is not male and female. Exactly like that is the ego: the cancer of the mind.

And who is telling you to surrender to the male ego? Surrender is never to the other. When two persons fall in love, both surrender to love; nobody surrenders to the other. If there is an effort from the other that you should surrender to him, avoid him - this is not love. Love never demands surrender. Surrender happens naturally in love, there is no demand for it.

If the man demands surrender from your side, he does not love you. Don't get entangled into such an unloving affair. He hates you, otherwise why should he demand surrender? He wants to possess you, he wants to reduce you into a thing. He wants to use you, exploit you. He thinks of you only as a body, as a mechanism. He does not respect you as a person, as a presence. This is humiliating, this is not love. Avoid it.

But surrender happens when there is love. And nobody demands, and nobody surrenders to the other - neither the man to the woman, nor the woman to the man. They both surrender to the god of love. They both surrender to this new opening in their being. And when both surrender to love there is beauty and there is freedom. You are not reduced to being a slave. In fact, only in love do you attain dignity, only in love do you attain to your grandeur. Only in love is your splendour released.

This is the indication of real love: that you become more than you were before, not less, and you are freer than you ever were. Love gives freedom. That is the very taste of love. If it is missing, if it is anti-freedom, then avoid it as one avoids the plague. Don't get into it - it is something else masquerading as love. But when love is there, you will find surrender has already happened; it is simultaneous. The moment you feel love for somebody, the surrender has happened. That is what love is. Not surrender - let me repeat again - to the other, but surrender to an unknown force that has taken possession of you two. But that is totally different from you and totally different from the other - you both have bowed down to an unknown energy. You become two pillars separate from each other, still supporting the same roof. You support something that is beyond you, above you, that transcends you, but you remain separate.

Love makes you more of an individual. It does not efface your individuality, it gives you individuality, it gives you uniqueness. Love is very respectful.

Sagarpriya, you say:

These are the ways of the ego. The other may have the ego, may not have the ego - I don't know about the other, who is that other? - but one thing is certain: you have a very subtle ego. That ego becomes competitive. Ego is competitive, intrinsically competitive. The ego becomes resistant or frightened, and in the fear, in the resistance, in the struggle, in the competitiveness, love is destroyed.

One thing is certain: you have to become aware of your subtle egoistic approach towards life. Drop it. At least from your side let it disappear. And then you will be surprised: maybe the other was not demanding any surrender; it was just your ego that projected it on the other. If it is so, now you can surrender to love. If it is not so and the other is still demanding... And you will be able to know rightly only when there is no resistance in you, when there is no fear in you, no competition in you.

Then you will have clarity, you will have a transparency, you will be able to see through and through.

And immediately you will know whether the other is demanding a surrender to him, or the demand is coming from something which is beyond you both. If it is from beyond you both, surrender. If it is coming from the other, avoid it. That other person is mad; he needs all compassion. Pity him, but don't fall in love, because to fall in love with an ego-maniac is dangerous; he will destroy you.

This much you owe to yourself. 

 

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