Just About Had It!!!!

Hello

I have been missing from this forum for a while mainly due to severe Depression from NOT finding a cure or maybe Some relief that I can LIVE with. I'm not going to go into it but I have tried ANY & EVERYTHING including change of diet that I never kept up for longer than 2 weeks because of weight loss of just HUNGER! But I do watch what I eat and drink a Gallon of Water a Day I'm crying as I wright this because I'm am OVERWHELMED and have NO where to turn because my family thinks it's all in my head because they don't smell me but EVERYONE in the street treat me like a I have LEPROSY! which is embaarrassing, shameful, have me feeling worthless etc! I'm still not working, Kids don't understand why mommy don't want to go to certain family functions! Just yesterday accompanied a friend to a meeting and the man she went to see kept coughing, rubbing his nose, making strange jestures, he could not get us out of his office fast enough and only went to shake her hand & not mine. She didn't really get the information she came for but when I mentioned it to her she said she didn't notice he was doing that! I am a Beautiful Black Women and I have No LIFE! I feel like My LIFE have been stripped from me!!! Everyday I feel like WHY ME, then I think of ways of KILLING MYSELF because living lick this is to much for me to handle! I want to take Pills just to fall a sleep peacefully because that's the only way out that I see! Leaving my KIDS behind is selfish of me but Im NOT LIVING my LIFE to it's full potentional either which is affecting them & me!!! I ask GOD EVERYDAY to heal me, to give me strength, to think positive, things will work out but guess what NOTHING has after all this time! Thanks for listening I just don't know how my LIFE will end up!! Tweet