i can relate to you both so much . i am also thinking about my high school love all the time, even after years. nothing helped so far, neither crying, nor looking for affection with other girls. in fact, kissing random girls always made me cringe and sick to my stomach.
i also thought i would be the only person who could be so sensitive. maybe hypnosis can help? i mean what if the right person never shows up ? it really sucks.