Been there, done that. I heard the same words 32 years ago and have spent all these years trying to change the outcome. If that was your spouse's feelings at that time it is not likely to change regardless of what you do. You are fighting a losing battle. You may be able to live together but you will never have that love and deep down peace and happiness you are looking for and need. Don't wait too long or you will wake up one day and realize it is too late to fulfill your dreams of a truly happy marriage with all the benefits.