I was searching for an answer to a question when I happened to come to your cry for help. I acknowledge that you could choose to give up or you can choose life. You chose to retreat many times ... away from being out there, away from people, their rejection or at least their reactions. That protected you from some emotional wounds. But that hasn't helped your suffering body. Your body needs natural light, sunshine. You can find a place to get natural light and sunshine without subjecting yourself to people's reactions to your appearance. There is a window somewhere that you can go to. You can open that window at the right time of day to allow natural sunshine to reach at least a part of your body. I have prayed to our Father in Heaven for you to receive new life and light in every way, physically, in your soul and in your spirit. He wants you to have that. Receive it by telling Him "I receive that new life You offer". Keep telling Him that day after day. He'll keep giving you more and more of it and you'll be healing from all the physical, soul and spirit wounds you have experienced. I'm going to be 69 on Saturday. I've been getting to know our Heavenly Father for many years. He has never forced Himself on me. But when I'm willing to receive Him, He is right there! He loved me before I ever knew of Him. He loves you just as much as me. Choose life!
I love you,
Gloria
Jesus said " I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life". John 8:12 KJV