I wish you well wow what a strong mama
I also suffered from Depression after both my kids.
It's great that you are so aware of where you are
oh the guilt I have a magic wand for mother guilt I am pointing it at the computer and boof gone now everytime you have mother guilt you will feel the sensation of someong tickling you under the arms no nee to be scared the magic has to befor it reaches aroun you to give you a hug for being such a good mom