Re: Boyfriend Checking out Other Girls

"If my boyfriend loved dogs instead of women, he would go crazy over every dog he saw, right?"

Uh........I was compelled to respond to this debacle based upon this warped viewpoint, alone. If your boyfriend "loved" dogs in the manner that he "loves" sex (or, apparently how he "loves" you), he would be stump-breaking every female dog that he passed. The two do not equate and the comparison is demeaning to YOU. You are not property, you are not a dog, you are not an object, and you have more to offer than simple sexual relief.

Sex is the ultimate expression of intimacy and, lately, the permissive nature of our current culture has reduced sexual intimacy into instant gratification. Group sex has been practiced since before mankind stood upright, but such activities do not promote intimacy. Our current societal view on one's sexuality is a direct catalyst to spreading incurable (and, lethal) STD's, as well as enabling more and more domestic abuse and violence.

Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines "intimate" as follows:
in·ti·mate
Pronunciation: \ˈin-tə-mət\
Function: adjective
Etymology: alteration of obsolete intime, from Latin intimus
1 a: intrinsic, essential b: belonging to or characterizing one's deepest nature
2: marked by very close association, contact, or familiarity
3 a: marked by a warm friendship developing through long association b: suggesting informal warmth or privacy
4: of a very personal or private nature

Intimacy is not sex and neither is sex equal to intimacy. You are, perhaps, realizing that your relationship is based upon sexual gratification and not, by any stretch of the imagination, a fulfilling, healthy, trusting, honest, supportive, and INTIMATE partnership. You're describing a hollow, shallow, ego-driven, and unhealthy relationship, IMHO. It may be that your "liking" girls has more to do with sexually arousing your partner(s) than with who you are, what you want to be, and where you visualize yourself ten years from now. Do you honestly visualize yourself engaging in group sex ten, fifteen, or twenty years from now? What if you produce children - will you entertain chance group encounters with multiple partners in your home while your children are asleep? Are you even considering the negative ramifications of your choices (AIDS, herpes, HPV, etc.)? Have you ever asked yourself WHY you are willing to engage in risky sexual behaviors?

Just give it some thought and take a harder look at yourself and who you really want to be.

 

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