Edited

My Aunt has schizophrenia. It manifested how you've illustrated above. She had a mental breakdown - never really understood what this meant - at the age of 17 or 18. She's now nearing 70 years of age and has been afflicted for over 50 years, confined for 10 years now to a nursing home for the mentally ill. It's definitely gotten worse over the years and she has episodes of 'paranoia'. I have childhood memories of her talking about how the 'police are after her'. Interesting how I always found this statement to be so out of touch with reality. Knowing now how this world is set up, it doesn't seem so crazy after all. Maybe she knows more than most of us do and her fears are justified.

She looks at you with half-there eyes. It's very sad. She talks to herself incessantly, nods to herself. Always sitting with her legs crossed and one swinging back and forth... so much energy to expend. Where does it come from?

Lately, since my own physical woes, I've pondered her illness and the cause. I believe there is a spiritual component to mental illness and also know there are physical factors involved. She and her 4 siblings (my mom included0 grew up on a farm, raising dairy cows. They were up at 5 am every morning milking cows, collecting eggs and cleaning the barn. Could she have a parasite? A B12 deficiency? Gluten intolerance?

My grandmother, my Aunt's mom, had diabetes. Hulda Clark says that diabetes could also be parasite related. She eventually had both legs amputated, a pacemaker implanted in her chest and vision loss from glaucoma. She was such a wonderful soul, didn't complain much and was always happy. My grandmother's since passed but I sometimes wish she were still around so that I could share with her all that I've learned.

Sometimes I curse my illness and complain about the time I've lost dealing with it. And then, I take a second look and feel a sense of gratefulness. Would I ever have committed this amount of time seeking truth had it not been for this illness? Probably not and so I am grateful for this gift.

I know I'm rambling.. I guess I just needed to get that out. Thanks for listening.