dude,

life is always at the end of the tunnel, sometimes it's not clear and u might get stuck, but its always there. ...

patience and persistence and soon you will find what joy life may bring.

i am like you, awake at this time 4 am because of stupid itching. its gone so bad i can't sleep. but there are so many other things i haven't tried i can't afford to lose here.

take good care,

Oh my gosh. I am so sorry. All I can say is we are not hypochondriacs, this is a real disease. I know how hard this is. I have been thru it. I thought my life would be better if it was over too. But things have a way of righting themselves. You are being tested. And we all our tested from time to time. We must be strong. We everything seems like it is as bad as it can get , then they turn around and life can be great. There is a lesson in this trip for each of us. Maybe you need to reflect in and see what is going on. Maybe you seek or feel you need approval from others. Maybe you are insecure. Believe me this illness is there to teach us. Teach how to take care of ourselves, physically and mentally. If you are really that sick that you feel you need antipschotics or antidepressants , then take them until you can get back on your feet. It does not have to be permanant. But do not let anyone talk you into anything if you know it is not right. you know what is right for you in your heart. Maybe taking some time off is a good thing. It happened to me./ I had to leave my job and I was soooo upset. I thought it wqas the end of the world. But when a door is shut a window opened and my life has taken some incredible turns ...for the better. So , do not throw in the towel. You are strong enough to do this. You might have to do it without family and friends , but you have us on the board to guide you through. Keep the faith.

Well that surely sucks! Please do not do anything that you won't be around to regret later. Besides, if you do that, your family will just think they were right all along and that you "did it" because you were indeed psychotic, which NONE OF US ARE! It is especially hard when you live with them. Heck, I live 3,000 miles away from my family, and they still got under my skin a little because like yours, they did not believe in "all this candida stuff". They do now, though. But, even traditional doctors are slowly starting to come around, so do stay on the planet so you can enjoy the sweet victory! Maybe you can find some journal articles about candida from soem reliable sources - they do exist. Even the NEJM has had articles on candida. Meanwhile, you can always say, "you're right" to any comment they make, and then turn around and go and do what you are doing anyway. :) Sometimes we have to do that just to make things easier on ourselves. Hang in there! ((((hugs)))))

Hi,

You're not a hypochondriac and this is NOT all in your head. You are SUFFERING. And, suffering is okay. I know that sounds strange but look, just don't let it panic you or cause you to become too depressed, just allow it to be and allow yourself to be.

I used to be an athlete as well. I became deconditioned when I spent more time on my academics and a stint as an editor made my allergies blow up. I eventually developed sinus infections and my doctor - who, by the way, is now being sued multiple times for malpractice - gave me tons of Antibiotics indiscriminately. The sinus infections got much worse and he would give me stronger Antibiotics for longer periods of time.

I can't even describe to you the sheer hell I went through for six years. I lost everything I had worked SO hard for. In school, I was a double honors student and I became recognized as a leading professional in my field. Almost overnight, everything was gone. I was broke, my credit, once perfect was destroyed. I had so many medical bills it was overwhelming. But, worst of all was my deteriorating condition. No one can imagine what it is like to have three infections all at once because you cannot fight anything off...For six years I woke up every morning feeling as sick or sicker than the day before, vomiting, extreme nausea and a myriad of other symptoms. I desperately tried to hide my symptoms and tried to push through the problems.. At times, during my speaking engagements, I was so sick I was slurring my speech. And the whole time, I told no one but my best friend.

When I finally got the proper diagnosis, I sobbed uncontrollably. I had "toughed it out" year after year with doctors telling me I was depressed and no one could find out what was wrong.

But I made it! DON'T you let them win!! Believe me, doctors are not as smart as you think they are... I know, I've tutored some! You simply must keep talking to these kind people, educate yourself and don't every question what you are experiencing. Just because certain doctors do not accept this yet, well that means nothing. Historically, there are hundreds of examples of naysayers who were finally proven wrong!!!

You can bet that this subject really get's me angry. I hate to see people pushed around by arrogant doctors.

Candida is REAL. It causes REAL devastation. It can ruin a person's life! But, it is treatable and you will feel well again. Please don't give up. I thought of suicide SO many times, and I know how you feel, I honestly do... But, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

Ride out the suffering.. Stay on a Candida diet, follow the instructions religiously, stay in touch with everyone on this forum... The sun is right around the corner. You can't see it just yet.. but, it is.

See my post about being cured of Candida


//www.curezone.org/forums/fm.asp?i=1083173

Please read my post a cure yourself.