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2 dreams 20 Apr 2006
2 dreams
Date: 4/21/2006 1:34:27 PM ( 18 y ) ... viewed 2240 times I need to get these dreams down and maybe they will mean something in time.
The evening before this first dream I had been listening to talk radio and the subject was LatinAmerican illegals. But also my DS18 is struggling with illegal aliens inside his own house, so I'm not sure which is influencing this dream more.
I come into a house, I live here but its not my current house. Its smaller and very very cluttered. You can't even walk 2 steps without trash and food and junk being stepped on. There are people - Latinos on the big comfy couch and they are just watching tv and munching. There are lots of other people around, some family and some strangers and some Latinos. I finally feel totally fed up and start yelling and demanding that they get up and get out of my house. They are no longer welcome. THey don't contribute to the house, they don't clean up, they have got to go. It takes many minutes and much tantruming and demanding before they begin to move. They give excuses and reasons why they can't leave and I don't listen, they have to go out and least onto the porch area to wait for their so-called meeting there. Then I go thru the rest of the house looking for illegals and demand that they get out. All the rest of us start in the kitchen cleaning up the food and dishes and total chaos.
The night before this next dream DS18 and I have had a long conversation and coming from that were many occasions where I was not as observant and vilgilant as I needed to be with his health and he had a lot of suffering because of that. I apologized and he realized he had been carrying a grudge. We both know that we were both doing the best we could at the time. I know that even if you try to be the best parent you can, there will be many mistakes and much suffering for the children anyway. All we can do as adults is forgive our parents knowing they did the best they could and we will need forgiving too from our children.
I had my own kids at home and everyone was younger than now, plus there were other children in the house. There came a man to the door and I don't remember why he was there. Then there was something I needed to take care of out of the house, so I left for just a minute. But it turned into longer than that. I was helping other people solve some things and noticing all the stacks and stacks of clutter in the garage and it took maybe several hours before I came back into the house. The kids were in the bathroom and some other parents were there and it came out that this man that I had left there with the kids for so long had sexually molested the group of them. Alex began to describe what had happened but he did it so whisperingly and silent that I never actually heard the words, just knew what they were and which children were involved. I was so sorry and felt so so horrible that I had left them that long knowing that if I had been there, none of this would have happened. I could see many difficulties ahead because of this event and I could not go back and erase the event. It was terrible terrible.
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