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Dead Sea. Dead Mission
Journey to a Fruitful Life
Date: 4/14/2012 1:40:51 PM ( 12 y ) ... viewed 1299 times I woke up feeling comfortable. Finally, no pains! Unfortunately, my aunt woke me up so she could take me to the dead sea. I wasn't into this idea, but I got out of bed anyways. In my head I wasn't really dedicated to a water fast. I don't know why I get this way. I become so dedicate to a water fast during the night, and then the morning I wake up I plan on breaking the fast, eating, and planning a new fast for tomorrow. As you can imagine, this has been going on since I've been 14. That's about 6 years now. Ugh. I want to say "No more" put a stand to it and actually mean it. I really, really want to. Food is just too addicting. Especially when you're around people who eat food. That's one huge trigger. Put me alone on a deserted island with bottles of water and syhade, and I can do this no problem.
The trip was nice. The drive there was such a headache though. My Uncle and cousins like to listen to ugly Mizrahi music on loud speakers. It's so, so annoying. I listened to my music on my blacberry with my cousin's half-assed earphones. My uncle drives like a maniac too. SO glad that drive is over with. The dead sea was calming and beautiful, albeit a bit too hot. We also forgot to bring sunscreen. Ouch. I got a bit burned around my shoulders.
We ate chamin (beans, eggs, potatoes, and meat in a crockpot overnight with seasonings/spices) It was really good. After lunch we spent a few more hours in the sea and hit the road back. On the way we bought a charger for my blackberry and hot pita and baguettes for the end of Passover. The pita was hot and fresh, it was so delicious. I ate it with tons of butter and jam when we got to the house. My Aunt prepared Mufletta for Mimuna (A Moroccan tradition of the end of Passover) it's like a flat thin bread covered in oil and fried and you eat it with honey, jam, butter... I had like 3 or 4. Needless to say, I'm done eating. But just like I predicted yesterday, it's easy to say that on a full and content stomach.
But this time I really do mean it because it's Sunday tomorrow and the start of a new week. That motivates me more. Also because I have this code "4/20/12" Which is funny because it alludes to 4/20 uncoincidentally (you know..the popular drug and get high on weed day in American schools) but it's also perfect in it's own way. It's a code to remind me of the steps I've presented to myself to complete. 4 alluding to 4 weeks of water fasting, 20 alluding to 20 weeks of raw/steamed, and 12 alluding to the final 12 days of water fasting. After that it's history. There's no stopping me. I'll be organizing my meal/snack times and won't be stuffing my face with useless junk food. I will finally savour and enjoy my foods. Finally wear what I've always wanted to wear, finally see myself in pictures and on walls, finally be around people socially and be out and confident.
That's such a great motivating goal. I'm smiling now just thinking about it. I'll be 20 and I'll be looking good. I'll still be young...even though I could have achieved this at 14 but whatever. Looking in the past will not help me. The important part is to achieve my goals, appreciate it, and move on to bigger projects.
Right now I'm motivating myself by listening to music and looking at pictures of pretty and slim girls on Facebook. Tomorrow will be okay, as all I need to do is go to base and just fix my bed and rest and do my hour of cardio. I have these kickass headphones my uncle gave me so I can listen to music on my blacberry and let my motivation run high. I love music. I love imagining myself being the singer and dancer and just putting on a show to a huge audience, or being in a music video that's number 1 internationally. Maybe that's a second project that could possibly come my way, who knows? For now, this current 4/20/12 goal is all that matters to me. Staying focused.
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