Re: is it normal for husband to look at bikini models online (secretly)?

With the additional information that you provided, I agree with Beenthere's feelings, 100%. He has an ex-wife/partner? Have you ever spoken with her in a civil, honest manner? Chances are, there's a REASON she's an ex!

I don't advocate divorce, but I also don't advocate remaining in a harmful, unhealthy relationship where deception, subversion, and emotional abuse is practiced. He confessed and demonstrated remorse in front of the counselor friends because he believed that he was "REQUIRED" to provide such a show in order to keep you on his hook. No doubt, if you look back on your relationship, you may begin to compare what you "believed" to be true about his personality to what actually "is" true, and the two will be light years apart.

Deception is one of those things that, once begun, is almost impossible to stop. Once trust is shattered, it takes an Act of Congress to put those pieces back together and there will always be that nagging feeling that "something just isn't right" about the whole partnership.

Check out the following site, REGARDLESS of the site title:

http://www.heartlessbitches.com

This site provides spectacular information for women to spot, identify, and avoid entaglements with dangerous individuals. There is a section devoted to NPD's who bait, lure, and snag their NPD supply sources and the red flags that they typically send up.

I would be furious, too. I would also insist upon marital counseling/therapy to address my shattered trust, his deception issues, and the overall health of our relationship. If he refused, I would seek individual counseling (not necessarily for YEARS, but for now), and consult a recommended divorce attorney. If children were involved, I would begin all of this yesterday (knowing what I do, now)!

Best wishes to you. Tweet