PRECISELY! That's one of the suggestions that I made: consider WHY we chose this person, why we're remaining, etc. Then, there's the truth that no man, woman, house, car, illusion of security, etc., is worth the well-being of an innocent child.
My feeling is that the original poster knows exactly what to do to safeguard her children and, most likely, her Self. It's just the need of affirmation that she might be seeking. Sometimes, as with my Self, people need to hear/read what they already know to be true in order to take that first step.