Re: Filling in the gaps. The question is...

Local Hawaiian boy way to open coconut. Must be done inside house close to tv in living room with carpeting.

Get out all kitchen tools. Try and find one that will poke a hole in the eye. Decide that more of the husk needs to come off. Slam end of husk on floor. Grab small pieces of husk and strip it off until you can see the three eyes. Try poking eye with meat thermometer. This does not work. Try screw driver. Try all knife tips. Have old lady get out leather sewing awl. Let old lady poke the holes and drain the juice into a glass.

Hold coconut in hand with eyes facing up. This is the north pole on the globe.

Have old lady get heavy kitchen knife. (NOT the plastic handled one, the wooden handled one !)

Draw imaginery line around equator of coconut.

Hit coconut with back of the knife right on the equator in about the middle of Africa.

Turn the coconut clock wise a little bit.

Give the Indian Ocean a good whack.

Turn the coconut a little bit.

Whack Borneo.

Turn coconut some more.

Give a good whack in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.

Keep turning and whacking it.

Give it some more ! Whack Columbia !

Give it one more crack in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean and you should have two almost equal halves of the coconut.

Look how cute they are ! You will have NO crud inside after you practice this a few times. And you will have these lovely coconuts to make some thing out of too. Directions of coconut rotation can be reversed for lefties.

Spend half hour trying to pick up all the mess in the carpet in living room. Spend another few minutes cleaning up the kitchen. Make sure to clean off all counter tops so ants and cock roaches do not come to dinner in kitchen. Food cannot be left out here, the ants and cock roaches have a way of communicating and they come full force with in a few minutes.

Drink juice and do not share it. *LOL* Get grapefruit spoon to flake off the meat. Stab hand a few times with grapefruit spoon. Oh, it tastes so much better flaked than eating it in hunks ! Save half for later if you can stand it.

Mainland white people way of opening coconut.
Drill eyes and drain into glass. (makes a lot more sense to me)

Bust open with hammer in two whacks. Done outside so there is not mess to clean up after wards. (gets my vote) However it is easier to flake it if it's not in little pieces.

I guess it all depends on where you live ?


Blueduck