Re: I am down in the dumps today need encouragement

Hi Michelle,

I used to feel this way too when it first hit me. I was afraid to leave the house someday's and when I told my doctor that he of course said that it sounded like anxiety and agoraphobia and said to take the xanax. I found only one of my friends was tolerable to be around because he was the only person I felt didn't judge me or think I was a weirdo. My own brother and I actually aren't even speaking because of my whole illness right now. He thinks I am crazy and it has been extremely hurtful so it is easier for me not to talk to him because I am so tired of defending myself and feeling embarassed. It is very hard to explain this situation to other's because most people think you are a quack - I think that alone caused most of my anxiety...feeling like no one believed me and like everyone was talking behind my back about what a lunatic I am. It just adds to all of the stress we are already under when you don't have support. I definitely always had to plan and prepare if i was going to leave the house to go see a friend or to go see a movie - this almost always caused anxiety - sitting in a theater crowded with people...and in fact that is exactly why I didn't do anything on the weekend for almost two months except hideout in my bedroom. And during the week, I went to work and spent probably three days a week after work going to see different doctors or have different tests run only to find that all of my tests were normal and of course the doc's thinking it was all an anxiety problem.

Well, I haven't taken anxiety pills probably in close to two months now and I am doing much better no thanks to doctors. But I still have days like you where I feel totally emotionally drained...and some days I feel like I am never gonna get through this or beat it...on those days I just let myself cry as much as I want to. And then tomorrow is a new day! I also try to think back to two to three month's ago where I didn't know what was wrong and I was scared as hell...and having so many more symptoms than I have now and much more intense...and that reminds me that I am slowly chipping away at this thing. So, I know it isn't an answer to how to get through it because you seem to do the same thing I do...think about how much better you are...but at least you know you are NOT alone!