Re: Depressed - my mom died

hi,

i am very sorry to hear about your mother. the passing of a parent can be a tough thing to deal with. i would say to give yourself full permission to grieve, don't hold back, allow yourself the right to be sad and upset, its okay, don't fight it. let yourself grieve fully and completely for as long as it takes.

it is interesting that both of you had a similar experience with loved ones dying as soon as you left the room. do you have any idea how many times this has happened? many many many times. the reality is that for most people dying is a very private experience, and they actually wait until they are somewhat alone before they let go and pass to the other side. this wasn't something you did, this was your mothers choice. i advise you to do some research on this. call someone in your area who does hospice work and ask them about this issue, they will tell you that it happens all the time. don't feel guilty about it, i am sure your mother knows you love her and wants you to have a good life and not be emotionally crippled by this.

i think getting help for the alcohol is a great idea, and i hope that goes well for you. this whole experience could be spark for healing in your life.

just remember, don't feel guilty about being sad, go ahead and grieve, don't listen to some voice that says buck up and deal with it, no you have full permission to be sad and angry with this one.

ff