I lost my father forever!

Hello ,

First of all, English is not my first language.

I want to tell you about my father story, He was a good man, Good to everybody,
Everyone loves him and he was kind and lovely person.
He died before 3 months ago and I cry every day when I remember him or when I look at his pictures.
He died at a young age just 45 years old !
The hospital said he has " AIDS " first they said HIV than they said AIDS !

Man , I don't believe there is something call " AIDS " or my father has " AIDS "
He didn't have sex with other women in his life only with my mother.
He wasn't a drug user.
Maybe he catch the viruses from dirty dental clinics or dirty barbershops !
I don't know just all i know is we live in a bad world , I am not negative but i lost my father! ....
My father stayed at the hospital just 2 months and died
I was shocked when I saw him at the hospital and I really don't know what should I do ?! How I can save his life ? I was confused !

And I usually read about health and stuff just like you and I hate doctors and hospitals specially after my father death ! I hate them
and I believe in the plant , Nature stuff
so when I saw my father the first time at the hospital he cannot move at all !
so I was thinking if I take him out of the hospital to save his life but I was broke I don't have money!no care, nothing.
If I take him out How can I buy nature stuff like the stuff in this site u know but I don't have money so I was confused and I didn't take him out .
When the doctors start give him Antibiotics or medicines of Tuberculosis
my father was really sick I mean very very sick ! dropped his health very bad ! before the f***ing medicines he was not that bad u know he just cannot move but after the f***ing medicines he was in a very bad health very sick !
and just one month and he died .. !

I am just guys very angry of the hospital and the doctors and angry of my self why I didn't take my father out side the hospital ?! why ? even if I don't have money to buy nature stuff to cure him and take care of him!!
or just take him out of these f***ing toxins !


mmmm ..
Do you think guys if I took my father out the hospital and let him just stay at home he will live until now? please be honest with me even the truth will hurt me !

I am afraid if I didn't help my father that much !! u know ! my heart broke and hurt me a lot !
My father was contact with me with his eyes at the hospital if he wanna say yes he close his eyes for 3 seconds like that !
.......

I don't know I just wish if I can go back of the time and take him home !!

I didn't take a lot of pictures with him!!
He will not see me when I will graduate from school!
He will not see my kids!
Why this happen!!

I really miss him too much and forever


I don't know if his spirit fly and he watching me right now
I just sometimes talk to him like if he was in my bedroom and say SORRY to him

I don't know what else can I say
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