Thank you Sherpa that was very kind. These are indeed very dark times and being someone who never held much faith, it is definately becoming understandable and tempting.
My doctors are sending me to yale to be seen by multiple specialists. Luckily, I was raised in Connecticut so my family is there. I, too, praying to whoever t is I pray to that somehow I will pull out of this.
And purple- the PS I took was soy lechithen. It was Jarrow brand. 1, 100mg tablet. I too considered the bovine thing but nope.