Re: betrayal

i know i have cheated on him.
S.S and i was having strained relations.he was much over possessive and i never had freedom to live life in my own way.he used to slap me in public place.S.S used to coerce me if i ever tried to leave him ,he will kill himself.K.S know each and everything
because he was my friend.S.S didnt know anything dat i have cheated on him so severely.if he come to know ,he ll destroy his life dats y i hide the truth till nowww....now we are not much in contact.i broke up with him by saying dat my parents forcing me to get marry....huge lie.. ...i m so upset dat i cant tell him truth.
and K.S know it that i have cheated on him...and still want to marry me...he told me dat u have to forget past to begin new life with me....
i alwys promise myself to forget everything related to past but felt weak after a week
...whenever i laugh ,,,then kind of question arise within me .how can i be so happy ,,,by hurting someone ....i dnt know to handle ..and i dnt have control on myself. plzzz seeking ur help