Re: Crying out for help!

Hi. Sorry to hear about your plight. It is the result of the compromised self-esteem, the humiliation and the trauma that you suffered when your friend insulted you by leaving you flat at a most crucial time in your life. By your own admission, it "killed you".

Intellectually, you know what happened, and that the effect on you was devastating. But the anxiety that resulted from that emotional assault has taken over your personality. Granted, you may have been an overeater before, but now you are left with the residual burden of that actue anxiety. It's like a circuit in your brain that won't stop churning or leave you alone.

There are 2 "dimensions" to a human being. The first is the emotional, with which we are all born, and which initiates us into the world. The second is the intellectual dimension, which slowly and gradually becomes integrated with the emotional part to form the final personality structure. Your emotions have been jolted, and your intellect is unable to comprehend or integrate the anxiety that was aroused from that incident. Once you perceive yourself as overanxious, your intellect tells you that you are a less-than good person and useless,and you are prone to becoming depressed. So you continue on a downward spiral.

From a good therapist, you would need some reassurance for your depressive feelings about yourself, as well as some calming to handle your overwhelming anxiety, perhaps in the form of relaxation sessions, affirmations and the like. As part of your discussion, you should consider the possibility that this "friend" may have been one who was jealous of you all along, and simply took the opportunity to take her wrath out on you at this most opportune moment. Jealousy is in fact the number one little recognized issue that secretly exists in most relationships.

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