Thinks, thoughts, healing stuff, and a generous helping of 'tough love' enclosed (like usual :)
Anne/everyone, since these posts (below) Anne_33 has sent me a few PMs, so I might make a few comments that make no sense to the other posts...but Anne'll understand.
I awoke this morning with out of bounds energy
So we know "lack of caffeine" isn't the cause for your lethargy and tiredness.
Perhaps the coffee enema, castor oil pack and other good things you've done the last day or two had something to do with the difference in energy. ..been in high gear all day today ...cant think straight either ,overly anxious and bp is borderline on the high side.. OR...
--you're having 'benzo flashbacks' OR
--the exposure to the paint & new furniture toxins is causing reactions OR
--your body is clogged & toxic, so the energy spurts are totally erratic just like 'general flow' throughout your body OR
--the original reason/cause and anxiety for your starting on the benzos has never been healed or resolved OR
--the unresolved panic/anxiety affects you physically OR
--the new synthetic/toxic supplements (see below) you've been "bandaiding" yourself with are starting to show their toxicity OR
--any/all combination of the above.
Okay Nola, regarding your blood pressure - what "numbers" do you consider 'borderline high'? Please answer this when you reply.
Once again, I will remind everyone - the top number/systolic used to be considered normal if it was your age plus 100...that was until they started pushing their blood-pressure poisons. Another thing for everyone to know, it's my belief that this gal is "totally addicted" to her bp monitor (and I've been begging her to wean herself off of it and throw it out the window for quite some time)...because everytime she sees her bp fluctuating (which is TOTALLY NORMAL, and particularly normal for someone with anxiety issues and still in benzo withdrawal), she panics, develops worse symptoms, and (usually) reaches for something toxic or unhealthy to lower her bp!
I have taken 2 tblsp of nutitional yeast today and 2 doses of IF#2 and 3 caps of IF#1 ..had garlic ,cayenne,ech in oj for breakfast on the run ..didnt have time to do the CE or olive oil this morning .grabbed some nuts and a V8 on the run for lunch.I am starting my monthly today also ..hormones outta whack here or what? normally I calm down when I start!
had absolutely no caffeine today at all ..
I like energy but this is insane!!! my mind is racing to no end and I am clumsy as all get out .
so I am gonna have to break down and take my vitamins to calm me down :::sigh::: of course ..see thats why I am hooked on em right now.. Nope, you're hooked on 'em because you're not doing what you know you need to be doing to cleanse and heal your body. (Or you've been spending so much time researching all kinds of other stuff, that you still don't know or believe what you need to do to heal your body). Of all the links in this post (all "required reading" before you respond, please), this one is one you should stop and read right now: ~!~ Schulze GEM! How to choose a protocol/teacher/book MUST READ ~RN by unyquity
For you (and others that don't know), let's review benzodiazepine withdrawal facts. The experts consider one is experiencing "Protracted Withdrawal Syndrome" when what? When you've been totally benzo-free for TWO YEARS and you're still having symptoms. Anne, you haven't even been off two years! You know recovery is not 'linear' and that things get better (and worse) in "pockets". You're experiencing/reporting the same dang symptoms over and over, but you're blaming everything but the most obvious & logical thing.
It takes YEARS for your GABA receptors and other bodily systems to heal themselves after being trashed by these drugs. Other meds, alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, toxic foods, etc...ALL of them (particularly the alcohol) further prevent you from healing.
You're not even to the point yet that you're SUPPOSED to not be having 'flashbacks'...in this stage a return of the symptoms and issues is expected (even if you hadn't been doing things to make it worse or slow your body from healing).
I have snapped at my daughter so much today that she finally said ...MOM I am just not gonna talk to you anymore today since you are in a bad mood... my hands were and still are shaking . I am a wreck ..spent the last few weeks unable to move and now I cant stop moving !! ugh! Anne, I'm not being unsympathetic (and I do understand how stressful & scary this is for you), but I think you'll agree that the definition of insanity is: "doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results". You keep playing the same ole record over & over, you keep saying you're going to take healing your body seriously (and you've made a couple of fairly decent efforts), but the same ole song keeps repeating.
One of the favorite phrases of my mom-in-law was, "well, you'll do it till you don't". Sometimes she said it with tenderness and softness, and other times she said it because she was tired of hearing us repeat the same old problems when the solutions were right in front of our faces.
just took another dose of IF#2 and now bp is up even higher !! ugh!! something is not right !! I am in full blown panic right now.. could it have been my nightly juice supper? of 1 beet with root tops,parsley,carrots,apple,celery ?followed with that dose of IF#2 ?? too much detox for me body to handle??which IF#2 should have taken care of that or ??? I dunno but I am pinging off the wall so am gonna get off here and go clean something and get ready for the weekend trip tomorrow plus work early in the morning ...trying to make the most of all this energy and not let myself get too uptight bout it ..HAHA! Whew - you're wearing me out, gal. You've had the same thing happen a zillion times for no reason at all (other than the fact your body is sick & symptomatic, you're likely full of parasites, your liver is clogged, you're highly reactive to just about anything...and you keep sucking down coffee & booze & 'synthetic supplements' to bandaid your symptoms, and not sticking with some kind of program consistently). It likely wouldn't have mattered WHAT you put in your body before it "hit", you'd be blaming what you just ate or drank.
sorry if none of this makes sense but I really cant help it right now at all.. Actually, the reason you "can't help it right now" is because of three possible reasons: 1) You don't believe in natural healing and you won't take enough time to learn about it completely enough so you can believe in it, and then make the choice to do it, or not do it. 2) You know enough to believe in it, but you won't prioritize yourself or your healing, and then do what it takes to heal yourself 3) You just like the attention. No matter which of those it is, guess what :::wink wink::: ....yep... you'll do it 'till you don't :)
waiting for vitamins to kick in to calm me down since I cant take any of the herbal tinctures that I got here..ugh! will be so glad when I can ..more on the 'bottom line' of this "vitamin thing" toward the end.
bless Ya'll cause I am back thanks for the blessings - rightbackatcha :)
Anne_33
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from this thread: http://curezone.com/forums/am.asp?i=1573806
Well Uny ..thank a lot.. ya know I need a pro's advice so I appreciate ya for that...
I know how serious this is I really do..things have got to change for me whether my hubby tags along or not...exactly right! There is NO one more important than you...ain't nobody gonna feel the hurt & pain that you feel and not if you get worse either. It's great if our spouse/friends/family will 'tag along', but if they don't, it's up to us to walk our own pathways. One of things I've always said (to myself AND to others)..."Hey, when it comes down to it, I'm gonna be the one in the casket all by myself, you're not gonna be there. I'll thank you to either help me on the pathway I've chosen, or get out of my way!" So there :::raspberry noise::::
I am gonna take the IF#1 and #2 for a while to help get me feeling better along with the charcoal.. I just got my order today for 5lbs s a wilsons coffee too ..so yay! on board with that.. I have done one coffee enema the other night already but was bout out of it so I was trying to be stingy with it..lol..which I know was ridiculous now cause I had regular organic coffee I could have used ..just dont think sometimes ... Yep "stingy is not allowed"...unless the rest of your family is working full-time jobs, you've sold all the "stuff" that isn't as important as your health/life, and everyone is starving and without electricity. Daily coffee enemas will help you SO much...I'm glad to hear you'll be doin' one every day!
did castor oil pack last night and I noticed some weird thoughts or dreams while awake..things like me taking a knife to a cow and ripping his backside open right down the side of the back bone from front to back and I was thinking what the crap??? then I realized I had the castor oil pack on and dismissed it and went on to sleep !! wow what a thought ! dont know what brought that on at all..toxins releasing maybe??? anyways it got my bowels going this morning fer sure ... Yep, the toxins come off & out like layers of an onion...and some of 'em can be downright rotten!
I did eat me a salad today for lunch ..I was out in town and started feeling a little weak and nauseous and hungry (thats how I get when I get hungry by the way .I get nauseous if II dont eat something ) so I stopped in the grocery store and got me a naked juice and a salad from the salad bar with loads of good stuff on it.. also while there got me some lemons,collard greens ,some more celery,organic beets ,and sweet potatoes don't forget, ALL non-organic "leafy greens" are now IRRADIATED! ARGH! Irradiated Food! Eating it? Here's the damage report! ..that way I will be eating healthy when I do eat/juice ..which I still have healthy options here ..i have natural peanut butter and hummus which I just love..organic carrots ,walnuts,pecans, apples, potatoes, dried legumes.... I have been eating pretty healthy here recently cause I have too..my body wont /cant tolerate the junk at all anymore .. YAY!
havent took my vitamins yet today just 1 tbslp of nutritional yeast ... the mini flush and fresh juiced carrot and celery.then a salad
I am putting peices of the puzzle together myself and have been for a while....I know I cannot do without my b-vits at all ..which is typical of a compromised liver too as liver needs them to detox and heal ..I have been reading on the www.liverdoctor.com site with Dr.Sandra Cabot and it has some really good info on there about the liver and different aliments that affect it ..a few nutrients are a must she says when healing ones liver so if I cant get them from vitamins I need to find a natural source to get em right??? Right! Read the "Schulze Gem" link about who to read & learn from...it's never someone that has ZERO clinical experience. I wanna go at this fullforce and be armed with everything possible that will help me in addition to what I will be doing from your advice....does that make sense? I am motivated !!! lplease dont take me the wrong way here ok.. I just wanna do all I can to beat this and if it will help me then I am gonna do it. Then get and read the SYL manual (PM me), watch all the Schulze videos, study everything you can find on the 'net about Dr. Christopher, Schulze and Dr. Gerson. (but not Schulzes new website, unless you know enough to know how to discern "old Schulze" from "new Schulze") 25 yrs of alcohol comsumption is what is killing me so I am thinking bout swearing it off for good That'll come closer/faster to destroying your health/life as anything .....I sure am gonna give it my best shot .Make a decision, say it outloud to us and everyone you know...and "make it so". "Giving it your best shot" means your leaving the door open for failure :( .I will be trading a social life that I become so used to for??? My health!!! health wins hands down for me on this one ...thats a no brainer ... Exactly, but there are PLENTY of ex-drinkers that still have a vibrant social life (even amongst drinkers, after they get it mastered). It IS possible to have a blast without melting your brain cells & pickling your liver! Really!!
Hubby is mentally exhausted and wants to get away for a couple of days so we will be leaving on friday and be back on Sunday ..I know he will want me to drink with him...I am gonna tell him up front that I will not drink with him this weekend or the next and not to ask me again .....I am slowly making him realize natural healing even though I know he wont do what it takes till he has too...sound familier?? yeah me too..but I have no choice like you say ..its a have to situation for me I understand - it's my job to do my best to make sure you win this battle :) ...I know he wont quit drinking in front of me cause he has no where else to go to do it...we dont have a garage so ..looks like I am gonna have to deal with it for now ...he is an alcoholic and he smokes(he goes outside) and I hope so much that he will get on board with me on this but I know he will not till something dreadfull happens to him.. (sigh) Yep, sigh...we all make our choices...and...?..."he'll do it 'till he doesn't". Sad, but likely true.
as for the couch outgassing...I just got it on Saturday ..its a sectional and they brought one wrong peice so they gotta bring me another one soon as they get their stuff straight ..but I got it covered with a blanket to protect it at the moment but the first time I slept on it I did not have it covered and I woke up with the awfulest smell in my nose and when I breathed in it hurt my chest !!! I got the heck up and went to bed and got over it but was thinking ....dang couch stinks and is gonna make me sick !!! will be glad when I can open up some windows and let this house air out ...I am so ready for warm weather ! lol.. although a good air filter /cleaner would help I assume...freshly painted room doesnt help either..and gotta paint one more soon but I diid get the low odor paint and for once that didnt bother me but it sure did my hubby ..he used to work in paint at the factory and now he cant hardly stand to smell any of it without it giving him a headache and making him dizzy WHY IN THE WORLD ARE YOU WAITING ON "WARM WEATHER"? Open the house up for an hour or so EVERY DAY! omg woman...you're dealing with all those horrendous toxic fumes and you're thinking that IF#2 caused you anxiety? Give me a break (please?). And "low fumes" paint doesn't have less chemicals, it's MORE chemicals covering up the chemical smell.
ok ..I tried the bone flesh and cartilage formula on my hand the other night ..within minutes I was having my typical reaction!! so had to wash it off best I could I sure hope you're serious this time about 'sticking with it' (for your sake and mine). Yes, I have seen these kind of reactions in others, but you're really going to HAVE to stick with it (further than just getting a "little better"), because your body/liver seems very compromised. ..but castor oil? no ..do I just wrap it up in an ace bandage or something with castor oil pack on?? ok me will figger it out ..but it is better today and I do think if I can get me liver straightened out everything else will fall into place..right now my body is so messed up... will get hubby to help with castor pack on my hand/wrist/arm area when he gets home from work ..100% cotton or wool socks over your hands/wrists works great for me :)
guys are here now fixing my heat unit and I cant wait till they leave so I can do a CE as my right side is burning again ..ugh!
ok they are gone and I managed to do one CE before my daughter got home from school..gonna do another one tonight before bed ..also took one tsp of IF#2 and 2 caps of IF#1 ...burning in side is better but still there...CE's are like a "liver miracle" as far as I'm concerned! :)
I used a colander with the enema but too much stuff came out to distinquish ....but I did see corn!!!! and lordy did that stuff stink ! haha..gonna have to dig out stethescope Liver crud has a special odor all it's own, that's for sure.
you are so right bout what shculze said .. if only people would work as hard at making themselves well as they do making themselves sick!! Yep, he's definitely "the most quotable" healer :)
I am guilty !! back then I was fearless ..more than I should have been too aaah youth (and stupidity...and peer pressure). We got over most of the stupidity, but very few people really ever get over the peer pressure. And getting over that just may the difference between being healthy, or sick like the rest of 'em.
The link for the vitamins I take is www.womentowomen.com/products/essentialnutrients-label.aspx I just take the multi although they did send me the bone formula.....see below
I am scared of natural healing due to my reactions but at the same time I am scared not too..I know its from my body being so comprimised and until then I will have to do the best I can ..
I do already have some hawthorn but may order some unyworm from you soon cause I know I need it unless you think that garlic would be enough to do it along with cayenne .. will be ordering some more IF#1 and #2 soon too as I am bout out .I have kept the #2 in the freezer to preserve it :::grin::: you know where to find it :)
tiredness has set in on me again along with another headache ..still gotta cook supper for hubby ...ugh! its got to get better for me really soon ...think I will take some more charcoal and some nutritional yeast for energy cause I so need some right now.. no caffeine so far today and really feeling it right now ... Learn to "ride the waves", Nola. You keep "taking something" to get an immediate effect...and sweetie that's just not the way 'healthy stuff' works. Sure it works for cocaine, benzos, liquor and synthetic/chemical "vitamins", but very rarely do you feel an immediate effect from anything natural (a few you do, like cayenne & lobelia). Remember the tortoise and the hare? You're like the hare on crack most of the time you post! lol FOCUS! You want to be the turtle, Anne...not the jacked up jack rabbit!! BREATH DEEPLY...EFT...BREATH...EFT...RELAX when something starts upsetting you...tightening up makes it worse. This isn't something that magically happens with an herb or a Xanax, this is something you LEARN & PRACTICE (and something to UNlearn).
yeah I know all bout the vitamins but in my case I have got to take something or I would end up in the mental ward..haha ..no jokes there.. ever since coming off of benzos I have been hooked on the b's and I do think they are the lesser of the 2 evils right now.. which the b's are in the multi pack that I take and until I get my body in shape then I have to take em to stay sane ..I honestly believe that what you said in your PM about "too many" is very true. About 75% of those "vitamins" are as "natural" as a benzo. :( See below
its complicated with me and there are very few things that I can take without reactions so I gotta be really careful especially with herbs . I have plenty of nutritional yeast to take though on standby but right now I need something more to like I said keep my anxiety down. Do your best to learn to 'ride the wave' and control your responses. These reactions? NEVER have killed you! They NEVER have caused anything close to your worst fears! This is a skill and a habit you need to learn & practice. And of course, if it's a benzo-remnant, there's not a lot more you can do than that.
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Now then, let's get down to this "vitamin thing" - and let's make this once and for all (PLEASE!)
Pink - SYNTHETIC (totally unnatural substance, made in laboratory)
Green - Likely synthetic or a blend of synthetic or natural
Background Info on Synthetic vs. Natural Vitamins (Q&A)
Natural Vs. Synthetic Vitamins (names-sources)
This applies to vitamins & minerals as well as herbs: Isolated/Standardized Extracts of plants & herbs
54 - Death by Ben-Gay: Synthetic vs.Natural « ESSENTIAL OILS BLOG
Supplements-Mineral and Vitamin Supplements The HONEST STORY
Okay, so here's the "bottom line" on these "vitamin bandaids" that are mostly synthetic chemicals that really (really) HURT YOUR HEALTH. You wouldn't/shouldn't respect me if someone kept taking a Xanax to "bandaid their symptoms", kept posting about it and justifying it, and then taking my time (and others' time) posting about it all the time....right? Right. You'd likely tell them (hopefully respectfully) that the chemicals were making them worse and they needed to do what "Uny said" and start dealing with the CAUSE of the problem.
So, that's what I'm telling you. I just do not have the time (or the energy) to read & respond to all your "crisis posts", when I know you're making yourself worse. Nola, it's YOUR body, and I don't have the right (or the desire) to tell you what to do with your own body. But it's MY forum (and time), and I do have the right to ask you to either 'stop making yourself worse' or stop posting about it. I think that's fair enough - I hope you do, too.
You know I love you bunches & bunches...right? RIGHT!
Unyquity
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