Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now

Morrissey on depression:
"there is no one who can tell me anything about it, and there is nobody who can help me."

Rokybird says: After 45 years of Depression I know very little about it. I know certain things make it worse; food allergies ,mercury poisoning,toxic metals,food additives,vitamin deficiencies.
A few things may be helpful;exercising but even that can be limited.
Real meditation which is not the candy store version hyped everywhere does not cure it. Even sitting in front of an Enlightend Being doesnt cure it.

I think it is bio chemical disorder of the happiness center in the brain not a psychological disorder. anti depressants just make one feel numb.

No supplement that I have tried has cured it.

If your nutritionist gives you a long list of supplements to take they are just guessing at best or con men at worst.



MOrrisey:
a few quotes:

Some people say Depression is your art.
I think it makes me extraordinarily unique. Who on earth would want to be Van Halen?
Ever fancied Prozac?
I know little about Prozac. I've tried it of course. We all have. But it just didn't work for me. So there's no appeal in something that doesn't work.


Have you every been in analysis, Morrissey?
"I have, yes, many a time, and left in extreme disgust. I find the billing unrewarding, certainly. But I have been steeped in personal Depression for so long that I feel there is nothing any doctor or psychoanalyst can say to me. I know all about depression and the weakening of the human spirit and struggle, and there is no one who can tell me anything about it, and there is nobody who can help me."


Were you happier as a teenager?
No, I was never happy then. Not for one day. But I think I've probably touched upon that in the past. I've mentioned it somewhere! I never thought it was possible to get this old. I thought when you reached 35, you were shipped off to Anglesey. But I don't want to go back. There's nothing happy there for me. I'm getting happier as I get older but that's
sheer perseverance. I've just stuck with it. I never enjoyed life in my twenties, not one minute of it. It was a test of endurance that I'm surprised I survived. Professionaly, of course, I was doing very well but personally it couldn't have been worse or more difficult for me if I'd been living in a mud hut in Leeds.


Do you feel loneliness even though you could easily be surrounded by people?
Yes I do, because loneliness has nothing to do with how many people are in the room with you. I'm now thirty-three, which is not young, and I feel I'm just a very lonely person, and will remain so.

Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now
By DragonAttack

It's about time for me to announce that I love Morrissey, but I don't think that I love Morrissey the way other people love Morrissey. As I understand it, the typical Morrissey fan is a female college freshman, she is quite possibly wearing all black, and she probably wants to be a writer. At least when I discovered Morrissey, that was the norm. Keep in mind, I discovered Morrissey (and The Smiths too!) in 1990, when all of my sulky wannabe artist friends listened to XTC and The Pixies. And their older sulky wannabe artist friends introduced them to The Smiths, Morrissey, and the Violent Femmes.

Oh, I don't know how I ended up with all of the wannabe artists as friends. My friends liked They Might Be Giants and R.E.M., and I liked Queensrÿche and Soul Asylum. What counts is, when they discovered Mr. Morrissey, and introduced him to me, suddenly we had common ground. Morrissey is so great! But I don't think I listen to him correctly. (Judging by the standard set by surly college freshmen everywhere.) As near as I can tell, to listen to Morrissey, you need to be depressed. And the purpose of listening to Morrissey is to become more depressed. That's not how it works for me at all.

If I am happy, I listen to Morrissey. If I am not happy, I listen to Morrissey and proceed to get all happy. My old rule used to be, "No matter how bad I have it, Morrissey has it worse." And I would instantly cheer up. But my new rule is even better. It is simple, beautiful, and best expressed using your best Beavis voice. It is, "Morrissey rules! He rules!" Morrissey is not depressing! He is clever! He is witty! And he used to front a genuine rock band. I know that some people like to lump The Smiths in with The Cure and Depeche Mode in the "pretentious college music of the eighties" category, but one of these things is not like the other. The Smiths! The Smiths do not belong in this category. They are a proper four man rock and roll combo.

I admit, Morrissey's work has not done much for me lately, but his first solo records released after The Smiths broke up are very rock and roll. Not as rock and roll as, say, Ted Nugent, but far more rock and roll than people give him credit for. Morrissey is my hero! He must be in my top five for razor sharp lyrics. "I will not change and I will not be nice," says Morrissey. Morrissey! You brilliant man! Neither will I!

And his lyrics with The Smiths were equally delicious. "I was looking for a job and then I found a job, and heaven knows I'm miserable now." Yes! Morrissey knows! Morrissey is miserable! Morrissey is miserable and wise and is passing the misery on to us at a low, low price! But it's not taking! I am too delighted with how clever he is. "A dreaded sunny day, so let's go where we're happy and I'll meet you at the cemetery gates." What? Oh, Morrissey. You can't be that miserable. You cannot fool me. You have just tapped into some sort of misery culture and become its spokesman. I saw you driving a tractor that one time, you aren't that glum!

Really, I did see Morrissey driving a tractor. It was in his video for Suedehead. Since I have been driving around listening to Morrissey, I have been remembering the times when the wannabe artists and me watched Morrissey video collections. I have not seen the Morrissey videos in a decade, but Bona Drag is giving me flashbacks. Morrissey on the tractor. Morrissey in the woods falling backwards from the table when the table starts rumbling in the video for Ouija Board, Ouija Board. Morrissey frolicking through the desert during November Spawned A Monster. The man is not miserable! He frolics! I have seen it!

And do I ever get sick of doing Morrissey impersonations? No! You cannot be unhappy when you are driving around town belting out, "I AM the last of the FA-mous...IN-ter-nash-un-ul puh-LAY-boys!" Or, "Tha-at No-vem-ber, is a tiiiiiiiiime which I must put ooooout of my miiiiiind!" It's even better if you are doing your Morrissey impersonation at home, because then you can do the Morrissey dance. You know, the Morrissey dance. It's just flailing to the music. Morrissey does not always display so much rhythm. And let me point out to other Morrissey fans, it is damn near impossible to be depressed when you are doing the non-rhythmic flailing Morrissey dance in your bedroom or living room.

These are the things that you should have learned about Morrissey today:

1. If Morrissey is trying to depress me, he isn't doing a very good job.

2. Morrissey knows a thing or two about rock and roll, so give him a break. The man used to head up the New York Dolls fan club, English chapter. He knows about rock and roll! Go buy The Queen Is Dead and tell me if I am wrong.

3. If you do tell me I am wrong, you will be violating Rocksnobs Rule Of Etiquette #1, and I will ignore you.

4. Morrissey rules! He rules!
October 7, 2002