--"pull minerals from whatever it touches, which is one of the reasons I don't believe it should be consumed by humans."
Precisely why you should consume it if you're going to consume any water at all. Minerals are constantly going in an out of the body regardless. Given that, you want the liquid that's going to clean extracellular tissues and feed and lubricate intracellular tissues. Pure water fits this bill perfectly and with no accumulation of un-assimilated minerals (i.e. plaque).
I steady diet of hard water is steady road toward hardening of the arteries, arthritis, kidney stones, etc. Studies on pop and the acidity condition they contribute to have nothing to do with the pure water ingredient. It would be the best part were it not for the tin cans they are stored in.