While figuring out 'how'...

While figuring out 'how' to get to complete well-being, I've noticed that I follow patterns of thought, and feelings.

First...'the squeaky wheel gets the grease'. If I have a toothache, guess what gets addressed first!

If I also feel hungry, every available food is suddenly judged for its suitability during this tooth crisis. Hot? Cold? Chewy? Soothing? How hungry am I, anyway? Wouldn't I rather put some cloves in my cheek and go to sleep?


Second...'I remember'. If I get invited to share a bed with a dandy fellow, all my previous sexual encounters (or the lack of them) jump into my head. Most prominently, I will likely think of how I will carry this off successfully.

How will I look? What will I do? Will he still like me in the morning? How much do I want to do this, with this man, anyway? Tomorrow?


Third...'I speculate'. If I get the bright idea to move to another city, right away quick I see myself there and question the negatives.

Can I afford it? Will I like it enough? Am I 'allowed' to, given my current obligations?


My point is that I usually see the 'obstacles' first. 'Cautionary'.


Overall, I want well-being...yet I think of the reasons 'why not', before I think of, "Yes."

I think of, "Yes, but..."


One day I was donating blood. As usual, when my blood pressure was taken, pre-donation, it was borderline high.

The senior nurse said, "I'm going to teach you Biofeedback." I thought, 'Yes'. (No, 'But...')

I did as she instructed. I lay back in the chair and rested my head on the wall, to relax. She lowered the light, and left the little room, closing the door behind her.

I simply allowed myself a few minutes rest, even to sleep, if that should come.

When the lady took my blood pressure again, it had dropped 14 points.

I was amazed, and I tucked away the memory of how to do it. ...A capability I didn't know I had.


Now, when I have questions, I remember how to 'sleep on it', and how to 'allow' myself to come up with a solution...from within.

I no longer have to rely on my thinking, critical, cautionary mindset to 'figure' things out.

I think it would be best to use that ability more often.

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