Re: felt like writing

oh bella---God bless you, I know exactly how you feel. i feel this everyday, i have for the last 23 years. i have/am in a constant struggle--there are periods where i think i am fine and then--wham--it is back. no matter how much therapy, periods of non throwing -up, not being anorexic... it all comes back. i wish i could say it will be alright, and maybe for some it is, but i have come to learn, from years of living this kind of life, that it is a disease--much like being an alcoholic--it never goes away, you just learn to control it. to stop, but still struggle with the everyday urge--i apologize if i am offending any alcoholics out there, i do not mean to. i know it is a disease, a hard struggling one--i have several in my family and i have watched their pain and suffering, so please do not take offense. bella---i wish i could make it better for you--give you words of encouragement and wisdom--i truely do, you are very special, i am sure. all i can offer is prayers, an ear to listen and some comfort in knowing you are not alone. i, at this time am hitting an all time low. i am lost, lost in myself and feel as though i am out of control. on the outside people think i have it all--which i do--a happy family, wonderful husband, nice home, secure job and the list goes on---but--something inside me is sad, that is why i do this to myself. why????? i guess if i knew the answer to this question i would not be in this state. as i am sure you wouldn't be either. i feel your pain, and i am here for you. if you like, you can e-mail me. i don't have the answers like i said---but i do have a heart. blessing to you--you are in my thoughts and prayers. Tweet