Re: I have lost all hope....

Kris, seems to me that you have gotten lots of good advice for exploring your lack of energy and for improving your health and wellbeing. I learned a long time ago that few people follow advice that could help them. It is for this reason that I recommend that you get out of your shell and get some expert consultation. (not to suggest that many of these responders aren't expert, but face-to-face assessment is the best approach.) Like you, I am not always thrilled about our sick care industry, but there are family physicians and health professionals who have seen numerous individuals with similar concerns. They may advise you to take some meds to help you get temporary relief from these symptoms that you describe while you develop some daily health practices that can empower you to get motivated and inspired to feel like a whole being again.

Also, do examine the vast information on Mindfulness and various methods that are employed in Integrative Health. For example, Dr. Sykes introduces her practice in this log that I wrote about alternative medicine:
http://www.newciv.org/mem/persnewslog.php?did=400&vid=400&xmode=show_article&...


You describe your experience very vividly and could certainly benefit from a whole health program. I once considered suicide and was about to turn on the gass when I received a call from a friend who I had not heard from for years. For some reason he had this feeling that I was in trouble and I needed his help. I'll never forget his call as it led me to take a new direction in my life--I was stuck and didn't know how to get out of this black hole. I changed jobs, moved to a new environment, started a daily health routine, joined a therapy group and never experienced this extreme pain again. But, of course, this was only my solution and each of us has our own challenge given to us by nature.

Best wishes,

Jerry