I have been married to my beautiful wife for 1 year now, but lately im not sure how much longer it will last. I am 24 and she is 25. We've been together for three years now, and have been absolutely in love with each other every minute of it. She is my best friend and I look forward to spending the rest of my life with her.

About a month or two ago, we began going out and seeing a lot of her best friend (among other friends); drinking, going out and having fun type stuff. Well being drunk a lot, we (the three of us), used to joke about having a threesome, flirted with each other, etc, etc. Just joking around about it when out drunk at the bar or whatever. They've made out before and seen each other naked. No big deal. When me and my wife were alone, we talked about it a few times and got each others ideas about the subject. We basically set ground rules if ever such an occasion were to take place, but the main rule was for me to never have sex with the other girl. Anything else my wife was o.k. with. She was down for it. It was an idea to have fun with, and a chance to experiment a little as a husband and wife.

Well sure enough one night we're all wasted and decide for the three of us to go back to the friend's apartment. We all fooled around all night (use your imagination), and it was great. I hardly touched the friend. We all went home happy. No harm done.

A few weeks later we're all out again, but this time totally obliterated. We go back to the friend's apartment along with a few other friends for after hours. Eventually everyone leaves except me and my wife. The three of us go at it again, with more comfort than ever. You can probably guess what happens next. We have very vague memories of this, but we know it happened. Basically, a hand (stupid me thought it was my wife's, but it was the friend's) puts my member inside the friend. Now remember we're all completely wasted. A few seconds later my wife feels what's going on and gets up, grabs her clothes, and heads out of the room. This sudden jolt startles me and makes me realize what is going on. I say to myself, oh my god, and i get up, grab my clothes, and go after her.

We both knew what happened and sped home and went to bed without saying much, mostly being in shock. The next day we both discussed what had just occured, and were both visably hurt. We cried and cried and suddenly felt like everything we worked for in our three year relationship was tainted and ruined. We talked for the next couple of days, replaying the night, making sure we both agreed on what happened. I never had any intention of having sex with the friend, i didn't want or need to. It was only for a few seconds, and I realized what i did right away. It's not like I went behind her back and had sex with another girl without her knowing. But we have a problem nontheless. She partly blames herself for letting things get out of hand, and i certainly blame myself.

My wife concluded she needs to spend some time away from me for a while and needs time to think alone about this and see if she can get over this. She advises me to tinker with the idea of seeing other people, but i keep assuring her I want to be with her and only her for the rest of my life. That's why i married her, she's my wife. She's moving into an apartment next month and I will feel worse than ever.

Lately it's been really hard being around her and acting around her. Sometimes we can hold comfortable, natural, offtopic discussions. Like nothing is wrong. Other times it's totally stale and awkward. But i know what i feel now is nothing compared to what i'm going to feel when she moves out. I'm so sad about everything, I wish it never happened, and i wish she loved me liked she used to. My wife is so full of love and warmth, I am her whole world. I love her more than anything. She's the love of my life. She's my baby.

Thanks for reading all of that, I didn't want to leave anything out, I wanted to get it all out there. Does anyone have any advice as to what I should do, how i should feel, what is going to happen to us? Can we salvage this marraige and love each other like we used to, or is it ruined? I'm hoping time will heal this. She tells me she still loves me and we are occasionally affectionate with each other. We love each other so much, but she is so hurt right now. I hope we can get through this.