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Day 7 of 120 voici
Well on Day 7 - where's the detox? I still have freckles, man. Music, films, and dreams.
Date: 2/26/2006 1:15:30 PM ( 18 y ) ... viewed 2242 times Ites chillen - day 7 of urine/water fast. Feeling fine. Continue to be surprised, relieved, troubled by this. You know the Detox Stages they have posted in the Master Cleanse section - all that stuff about mucus discharge and clogged sinuses? Alack - no resemblance to this. As I keep musing - is that because urine is some sort of fast emollient, making a fast naturally gentler, or is it because it's screwing up detox? Or am I just a slow (or non-!!) detoxer? In any event, if you wanted to do a water fast but couldn't take off from various duties and things, why not try a urine fast? In spite of the fear/safety issues people raise about this sort of thing, I must say that so far one's own body is swiftly disposing of such misgivings - it just doesn't _feel_ as though any harm is being done to it. Now as we detox-trackers know, that may be bad news about the cleansingness of the urine fast, but it addresses the whole "danger" question at any rate.
Symptoms: a pimple breaks out suddenly. A sneeze. More liver-area cramping for a few seconds. C'est tout.
I just dragged my rebounder (mini-trampolne) inside, having conceived the lightbulb eureka that even just a minute now and then might help the lymph drainage, the cells to detox, and so on. It certainly can't hurt. Because (the news will be when I _don't_ report it) things continue to be unchanged in any way, on any level. I've even been taking photos daily to see whether my appearance shows any sign of fasting or improved health or urine-miracle as to scars, even - and I look the same as I did a week ago. No sign that I've been fasting for a week. No sign of detox or improved health, etc. Every scar still firmly in place, too!
I've "decided" (most of my decisions are revisioned, and I'm sure that goes double on a fast, when supposedly one goes through highs, lows, and general vascillations and shiftings of emotional stuff) to have a positive additude to the fast, rater than a grumbly old critical one. What is for certain is that I noticed that when I was writing in my fasting journal about how ogrous and moribund I am, about the current state I'm fasting to get away from, my body, even my cells, had a somatic reaction of being stressed, deoxygenated, poisoned. I felt it so much that I finally noted it after having noticed it the past few days. I remembered what the _somatic_ experience has been when I've "almost tasted" what success from this fast would be like, so I decided that every day I'll do some "affirmative" talk to my cells in present tense, telling them how healthy they are. Oh, cripes, believe me, the amount of times I've read that in all these new-aging (a typo for new-age which I'll leave as is) create-your-own-reality, think-yourself-rich things by people who eat deathly crap and maintain they've cured their cancer because "your body, and, of course, god, believes every word you say" - I've even in desperation tried some of that junk. It's always been as effective as taking a purple vitamin pill in the hopes of being healthy, and makes me furious. As a modality, in times of non-fasting, I wouldn't waste any more thought, breath, hope, energy, or money on that business. But in fasting it's different. Perhaps there aren't the same layers blanketing one's cells, cordoning them off from the mind. Perhaps it's just (toxic) food that really enforces those barriers. Or perhaps the body is just more sensitive, or just more noticeably sensitive - that is, perhaps the mind is a little more sensitive to the body than ordinarily when it's so occupied with food and so drugged by it. I don't know. Maybe there's no factual effectiveness in it at all, any more than usual, but it's just a way of giving my body/cells some extra support during this intense time for them to just sit them down for a little while and tell them "You're amazing - wow, are you ever bursting with health and wholeness and light and peace and love." I mean, I used to teach and practise yoga, and the relaxation always used words like that - the whole "cells bathed in healing white light" bit - but it didn't work in that context, except for the actual moment you were intoning it. But I think during the fast it might be a nice, encouraging treat for them for me to emphasize that sort of talk/visualization, rather than what I've been doing, focusing on how unhealthy and mutated and shot-to-hell they are. They must feel that, they must feel me doing that, and at all events it can't be helpful. The idea is to maximize the effectiveness of this fast, not only so it can be as short as possible, but above all so it can have been worthwhile, can actually show results, on which my whole life depends. I'm thinking a little soothing happy-cell talk might help with this, possibly.
Once again, I have to warn you UT-ers: those people who swear your scars, freckles, moles, red dots on your face, etc. will be gone from a few days of UF are lying to you. I've not yet found UT to have any good effect on skin (wrinkles, hormonal) or hair. They say that a week of UF can accomplish what would take 3 months on UT - all I can say to that so far, is, so 3 months on UT would do nothing at all for any part/system of the body/mind? However, I still wish to continue with the urine fast, in spite of the constant pull to the opposite - the alkalizing grass juice fast. I feel intuitively that the most pressing things I'm fasting for are the sort of things only urine fasting could address. I don't think weight problems are such issues, so if that is your main concern, you don't have to feel urine fasting is the only choice that's going to save you. You should be able to tell, listing the things you want to fast for, which feel to you as if they can only be addressed by water or water/urine, what I'm calling "deep fasting". But it's a tricky problem, isn't it - in many cases, parents and doctors and "experts" and professionals and things have made us feel that things "about us" that we are ever suffering from are "part of us", part of "who we are", even essentially, whether physically or in some less corporeal sense, when a change of diet alone shows that that was false, and they were really a part of them, their culture, and the food and drugs and media and ideologies they produce and push. What a wonderful thing that is to see that all fall, be sloughed, off of us.
Being so anxious not to sleep through the "valuable" 2-7 a.m. urine, I kept worrying-through-sleep all the early night (slept more or less from 10-7), but finally I caught the 2.30 train - it was only 4 oz. and strong. Then no more till I woke around 7 - again strong. So my urine continues to be strong. Every uropathist says the first urine is best of the day, having the most hormones and enzymes and things like that - I suppose that's the explanation behind why the small-hours stuff is supposed to be so powerful - it must have even more of what the first day's urine is supposed to have. I wonder if I'll continue _that_ practice post-fast. Depends on how much of a superbeing this whole business makes me.
I have stopped bowel movement completely. One of the things people make an uproar about concerning cessation of this during a fast seems to be the reabsorption of toxins. That could be true on a subterranean level, could even be an explanation of why no detox symptoms or sign of results. But on the other hand they say that
that circumstance of not eliminating through the bowels on the fast makes the faster sicker than s/he need be, with lots of unpleasant symptoms that could be pooped away - isn't that what they say? On that score, this is simply not showing itself to be true. I have no nausea, headaches, prostration, flu-y stuff, pains or aches so far.
And I still "feel intuitively" that I've chosen this particular askesis or path of UF and that UF does not go with forcing bowel evacuation - I don't know exactly why I feel that, I just do. It seems somewhat artificial in the hyper-natural context. And in the esoteric, arcane context of "urine magick". However, common sense also suggests: how do these toxins you're trying to detoxify _exit_ if not through the colon (you aren't sweating through the skin, and whatever's leaving through the kidneys you are re-ingesting)? I've been thinking about urine enemas - the most pressing reason by far being that one reads here and there, discouragingly enough for me, that they are far more effective than drinking urine. I'd do it right now, too, as part of my general campaign to maximize the fast's effectiveness (as witness, the 2 a.m. feedings...), except that I cannot for the life of my figure out how to assemble my enema bag. Why could it not have come assembled? The other reason is, you are not supposed to drink urine more than about 10 minutes after it's left home, to ensure sterility, which means, if that applies to intake of any kind, that I'd have to pee what I wanted to enema (no more than 4-8 oz. at a go) and then fill the bag and get it enema'd within 10 minutes. That's not a lot of urine, but I'm willing to accept that it could be significant. I've also read (Je Suis Butterfly's post on her cheering weblog) that sublingual diluted urine in a few drops is supposed to be much more effective than drinking it - I don't think I'd read that anywhere before; it's a little difficult to believe. More effective than UF? Well, I can certainly hold some every time under my tongue, but I'm not going to dilute it or switch to a few drops. This could be a mistake, shooting my foot. Another thing I like about that uropathy post of Papillon's (do you know the book or film about prisoners in an island of rock in French Guiana? I could see that again! it takes Papillon, unjustly in penal servitude and desolating deprivation and corrupt official environment, of course, years to break out - he's like 60 and prematurely aged but as in _Shawshank Redemption_ he's been working on escape for decades and he finally escapes by jumping off, almost certainly to death on the rocks of the cliff, into the ocean to swim away to freedom - he gets past the waves and sets off into the huge Atlantic, we and he know not whither - a lesson of bravery and love to all in prison) is that it says if doctors, etc. have told you that your illnesses are only helpable by surgery, or are genetic, or will be with you your whole life, why not investigate UT and see what it can do for you? But let's hear some actual evidence and proof from real people. I'll be one, too.
By the way, I'm anything but a Shelton fan, but I think I recall his writing in one of his books (you know he was adamant about _water_ fasting) a section on: signs you should stop the fast. Does anyone know what he or anyone says those are? I know I haven't had any yet, but, particularly till my phone arrives, I should probably have an idea of what they are - probably excessive vomiting is one. Funnily enough, I have an idea that hiccupping is mentioned, but my few brief hiccupping sessions over the past few days have hardly seemed particularly dire. One of my favorite Maugham stories is "P&O.", where a character dies from not eating and hiccupping himself to death whilst everyone else on the ship, knowing he's dying, parties for Christmas - he, however, had a Malaysian spell cast on him. I don't know any Malaysians.
Have stopped reading for the moment - kind of want to rest, though I dreamt about coming across stalls and stalls of free books that were great for fasting, then my cat woke me up - for several minutes, I could not believe I was cheated of that stack of fasting aid. I also dreamt that I met a couple of 2- or 3- week fasters and was trying to get them to tell me about their fast (for my own encouragement), but it was singularly piddly what they said and they looked quite like anyone who'd just had a "fast" on junk food. However, I woke up undeterred. Very much soul-soothing and nourishing listening of Wardell Gray, California avatar of boppery - those scrumptious ballads - and consummate dreamy _Easterly_ by Robert "Bob" Bannister - well, who needs food when you can eat that stuff?
"For people, as for flowers and animals and birds, the supreme triumph is to be most vividly, most perfectly alive. Whatever the unborn and the dead may know, they cannot know the beauty, the marvel of being alive in the flesh. The magnificent here and now of life in the flesh is ours, and ours alone, and ours only for a time. We ought to dance with rapture that we should be alive, and part of the living, carnate cosmos." Lawrence was seriously ill most of his life with tuberculosis, and died at 44.
Jack
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