Struggling, still 18 y
Eating disorders suck!
Having an eating disorder is a terrible thing. I hope to get on top of this soon, and get back to juicing. Here’s to hoping.
I’ve struggled with this for a long time.
This has been the worst year of my life.
I’ve lost 80 pounds and gained like 45. Not at all once, but that’s the totals. If you add the two together, the amount of weight I’ve changed was actually more that I weighed at a couple of points. This can’t be healthy.
I hope you all out there are doing better than I am.
visit the page
Day 7, a very bad day 18 y
Old habits are hard to break
I have had a relapse with bullimic behavior. I’m so disappointed with myself. I was doing so well! I had such extensive therapy for this. For months. I’ve had all the help in the world, yet I turn back to it in times of stress. Even with my new job, I still might not have the money to get my kids much for Christmas. This sucks. And I have a whole issue with cobra-ing my health insurance out of necessity and maybe not being able to pay for it. My new job is part-time with no benefits. This sucks, any which way you look at it.
After what happened, I had a soothing cup of tea. I’m ... read more
Day six, part two 18 y
And guess what. . .
I got the job! I’m really happy. Now, I’m like a shop girl.
I’ve had a so/so food day. I really was tempted by some food. But I pushed through. I’m rarely tempted, but today I was. I have such hard food issues. I’m a recovering bullimic, so I have to be really careful. Anyway, I’m still making it! I am glad!
And my weight loss is great. visit the page
Day six short update 18 y
a short, short update
Ack - job interview in an hour - send good thoughts!!!! I’ll update later.
Oh, and today’s weight was 134.5. visit the page
Day 5, part two 18 y
shopping, juicing
I was up really early, and then went Xmas shopping for my kids. Target had a race track on sale that my son wants. I only saved about 7 bucks, but that can be another toy, you know? It is going to be tight this year. I did splurge and buy myself a real cashmere sweater at walmart for - can you believe this - 19 bucks!!! Isn’t that amazing?! I thought so. It is 100% cashmere, cable knit, in a charcoal grey color. It’s just lovely. I know I should save money for the prezzies, but a girl has to treat herself once in awhile.
Anyway, back to the juice. I had a grapefruit tangerine fo ... read more
Day Five! 18 y
Another weight update + how I'm feeling
This fast is going great so far. Five days in and I’m down (drum roll please!) 9 lbs!
That’s right! Here are the stats:
Starting fast weight: 144
CW: 135
LBs lost - 9!
I’m thrilled with this loss. I’m only ten so so pounds from where I’d love to be. I’m only 6 lbs from where I’d be comfortable. So this is just great!
I’m feeling great, too. The only thing is that my sleep is getting strange, and it is absolutely critical for me to sleep well. Otherwise, bad things happen to my mental function. I don’t want to have to resort to sleeping pills again, but I will before I let mys ... read more
Day Four 18 y
Weight update and more
I’m really humming along. The weight is coming off pretty quick. Here’s the stats:
start of fast - 144
current - 136
goal - 124-129
So between seven and 12 lbs! I can make that before Xmas for sure! I’m really happy.
I feel really great. I’m really adhering to the fast rules, and feeling good! I estimate two weeks or so to complete my goal. I’m at four days in, so this fast shouldn’t be more than 20 days, hopefully. visit the page
day 3 18 y
And my weight this am was. . . .
Here it is, day three! I’m pretty happy this morning. I lost another 1.5 lbs, making my total 6 lbs. In two days! It is water, I’m sure, but I don’t care. It is making me really happy.
So to recap
starting fast weight 144
cw 138
gw 124-9 (depending)
So maybe 9.5 to 14.5 lbs to go. Not a huge amount. It’s feasible to do it a month, I’d say. I’d love to be there by Christmas. On my last fast, I lost 6.5 lbs by day three, but I was heavier. And by day 28 last time (where I’ll be by Christmas) I was down 17lbs. So if I lose at a similar rate, that would put me at 127 by Christ ... read more
day 2, pt 3 18 y
feeling good. . .
I had a great day. I stayed strong to the fast. I had three juices today - two citrus, and one carrot apple ginger.
The carrot apple ginger was one carrot, two small apples, and a nice big chunk of ginger.
I had three cups of tea today, too.
It was an all-around good day! My mood is up, my energy is good, I’m sticking to the fast, and I’m really confident this will work! visit the page
my picture 18 y
a picture of me from my profile
Day 2 - pt two 18 y
second day, part two, short update
I just had my second juice - a tangerine/grapefruit combo. It was great.
I went to look for a job, and already got an interview for Monday. I’m really excited.
I’m feeling good. A little hungry, but not too bad. I had to make my son lunch, which sort of was hard - looking and smelling the food. I’ll be okay though. No other physical signs to report, either. I am feeling energetic, I guess. visit the page
Day 2 18 y
First bit of weight loss plus job search
Wow - 4lbs down. I’m doing great! It’s water weight - but so what? I’ll take it! I’ll be back to the 130s by tomorrow morning, and I’ll feel much better. I just hope the weight comes off fast! Fast - get it?
I’m going to look for a job this morning. I have to take my kiddo - the youngest of my three - because he isn’t in school yet. I have childcare for afternoons and evenings, so I’m looking for something that would work with that. I’m really hopeful I’ll find something, with it being Christmas season and all. I need a job to be able to buy the kids presents.
I’m pretty happy ... read more
day one part two! 18 y
part two of day one, including some emotional stuff
I’m still hanging in. The first couple of days are hard, until the desire to eat goes away. I remember that. I’m a little hungry, but more likely want to eat for emotional reasons. It’s hard. My life is really a mess right now. I’m in a ton of financial stress and it is wearing on me as the holidays approach. Which in turn, makes me want to eat. Which I will do, than gain weight.
I have two problems that alternate - compulsive overeating, and compulsive undereating. There is no in between, really. It is hard for me to be moderate with my eating habits. Thus, my out of control n ... read more
Day one - starting the fast, rules for myself 18 y
day one part one
Today (Nov 29 2006) is day one of my fast. I want and hope to lose 18lbs. Here’s how the fast is going to work for me this time - a little different before. First of all, last time I was so strict!!! I didn’t have anything at all to eat for the entire time. This time, I will eat one cracker a day to take some pills that are absolutely critical for me to take. I don’t think the cracker will effect the outcome at all, having been through fasting before. Another thing I am doing differently - drinking organic hot tea with raw lemon. I know tea isn’t the best thing, or even raw, but I ... read more
An overview 18 y
the overview of my past juicing history.
I had a juice blog - juicing for 20 - this past spring. In preparation for my sister’s wedding, I had a lot of weight to loose. Here’s my weight history
October 2005 - hw - 175
Feb 2006 - 158
one month raw, 50 day juice fast
By May 2006 - 125 GOAL!!
June through the begining of July - gain back 12 lbs - go to 127
Go through some intense emotional stuff, STOP EATING ENTIRELY
by the end of August 2006 - 119 lbs - too thin
September to the end of November - 143!
Goal - 125 again
I love juicing and feel better doing it. That’s what I need to do again!
I know I can do it again. ... read more
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