Re: Myeloma? Lymes? severe arthritis? Can't get diagnosis! Decaying Rapidly...

well I have read that it can go undetected and that yes, the biopsy is the single only way to diagnose it. But I know it is INSANE to me that my cbc is normal. I just cannot believe it. I am open to ideas like I mentioned of having lymes disease or other autoimmune type conditions but it seems that what ever I have is effing impossible to diagnose and obscure as hell.

The only real symptoms I have are severe gluten intolerance (which I also read some stuff can be linked to myeloma even now) and severe joint pain. I also have visual floaters (maybe cmv?) and other pains.

I think of the grotesque possible idea of penile cancer because all my progression of symptoms matches it and hpv is the most untested for type of std which the system has no set up way to treat. (except cervical cancer for women. male high risk hpv just seems to be allowed to go unchecked and untreated in any way unless you develop a large tumor growth.) I have had an era of white discharge down there (first symptoms of cancerous hpv in men) accompanied by a small painless growth which went away after a month. since then, I have small scaley looking skin changes down there, however no large tumor type growth (that I can see anyway). They did not want to biopsy down there, even when I pushed for it. It's also not like it's something I really WANT to know I have anyway... and it seems like it's something they don't want to diagnose anyone with either. I can't blame them I guess. Who wants to tell a guy that they need to get their sexuality eviscerated.

I still need help. I don't know what the fk to do. I go to er and tell them I think I have advanced cancer and they laugh at me with my cbc results. I tell them I have the rarest form of cancer ever (hpv-penile) and they again laugh at me. It pushes me into a mental breakdown and they conclude I need psych meds and I'm just crazy with mild arthritis. I guess the world would be happier if I just killed myself, but the world's indifference just makes me enraged. It's almost the only strength I have left... my hatred and disgust for the neglect the medical system and the world has given me. I also feel like the only person on this entire message board who is actually MAD. I am filled with hate and disgust and while I know these are bad for any kind of condition, again, they are the only source of strength I have left. If only I could slow down my decay or make some progress towards getting better, I would not have to feel this way, (Or at the very least getting support from doctors or family) but I guess it's just not in the cards for me.

EDIT: I wanted to edit my original message more as I realized I got too emotional in it but I guess you cannot edit something after it has already been posted? I cannot find an edit function. heh oh well I guess. Tweet