Re: Cheated on and not sure what to do

"but why do you hold the "other woman" responsible for the choices that your husband made? Whether she initiated the affair or not doesn't matter - HE made the choice to act knowing that the consequences of having an affair could be devastating to all parties involved. Confronting the other woman will serve no purpose other than to divert the responsibility away from the person who SHOULD be held accountable: the husband."

My thoughts as well. It always bugs the hell out of me when the woman cheated on has to "confront" the other woman and blame the other woman. It doesn't matter if she seduced your husband or initiated the sex, he was a willing participant in it and knew what he was doing. What are you hoping to get from her? An apology? She isn't the one that needs to apologize, your husband is the one who betrayed you. Focus your anger on the one that deserves it.


If he has to work with this woman, fine. There is no reason whatsoever to have a friendship outside the workplace. If he respected you, he'd end it and cut off ties. But for some reason he's still holding on to something with her..Why is that?

"After that I will admit I closed off to him and everyone else."

What's up with this comment? Did he make you feel like it's your fault he cheated? Bad move on his part.

If there's any hope for your marriage you ain't going to fix it without marriage consuleing. I'm a believer in once a cheater; always a cheater.