(warning,private)Why cant I be happy about this move? wtf

gosh,

I cant believe that I really wont be able to be happy about this move. I mean I am happy,but not very happy. Not as happy as I would be if I had no crotch problems or burning ass or pain in upper legs. Cant believe this! I can hardly stand being at work!!!! I have to stand there and deal with all that discomfort with my crotch/penis. I just cant do it anymore. It is NOT going away. I ALWAYS have something going on. If my upper legs arent in pain,my penis has irritation and my ass is sore. If there is ever a day when my penis/crotch isnt irritated,my upper legs have bad pain. If my penis/crotch isnt irritated,my ass hurts and my upper legs have pain. You get the picture.

Someone from here told me that I should stop self-gratification for 2 weeks and see if that helps. They said that I need to give the skin a chance to heal. I cant do that though. I cant go 2 days without it. Being addicted to p 0 r n doesnt help. I really wont know if self-gratification is causing this penis/crotch irritation til im able to get it under control. THAT SUCKS! God help me. I noticed something on my penis today. On the whole underside of it,I have these 2 red lines running parallel the whole way to the head of my penis. Its like the shape of a triangle. In between the 2 parallel red lines,its red as well. I am not sure if its a normal part of my penis or what. It looks abnormal. Maybe scar tissue from too much self-gratification? Hm,it scares me. I am really worried about it. I am hoping that it isnt related to this crotch/penis irritation.

As far as my ass soreness and irritation. Who F***ing knows. It didnt start til I did the diet shit and colon cleanse. Even if I try to have a BM and dont,it still starts to hurt. Ususally if I have a bm it makes it worse so.

I go to my chiropractor this friday about the pain in my upper legs and ass. ugh. Hoping he can help. Hes not a regular chiropractor by way. I forget what kind he is,but there are only 3 of them in my state TOTAL. He almost cured my sisters scholiosis.

Well later all...please pray for me..im on the brink of breaking down...