Im responsing not reading any posts but yours, so here goes..
I would say that what you are saying is true in a sense.. but I met my hubby online and he is a fit, gorgeous man. He married me at 238 lbs and I got to 267 before I started thinking that wasnt good for my health and changed my eating habits. We have been married 7+ years and he never once didnt have sex with me because of my weight..all this to say this.. if you are with a man that cares about you he will look past that and love you for who you are the way you are. A man that doesnt is NOT WORTH YOUR TIME!!!!! I will say this as well.. I notice that our sex life has improved since I have dropped 77 lbs and you know why? Its because I am more confidant in myself now and therfore willing to take more risks and be more assertive. If there is one single answer to your question, I would say its that last statement in a nutshell.