Verbal Sex And....... Pretty please help.

I love sex. My boyfriend loves sex. I wouldn't mind that I do the seducing, initiating at least 90% of the time if he was only more verbal during sex. However, he is almost completely silent and it's starting to make me think we are not compatible or that he does not care for me enough to make real efforts to please me as I please him.

I'm not asking for the gettysburg address, mind you; just a little assertive masculine words of encouragement... It makes me very excited. As a result, I am am desiring less and less sex with him as I feel that I am the one that puts on a show for him and do extra things to please him while he simply enjoys rather than participating (even if he merely TOLD me to DO the things I am ALREADY doing I would find it TREMENDOUSLY exciting!) I feel like I am not being appreciated or that we are not compatible or that he does not care enough for me to make new sexual efforts of himself.

Also, he seems only to fully enjoy taking me from behind as it is easier for him to get a rhythm to orgasm whilst I tend to need some variety. In fact, he has a hard time coming when I'm on top. I wonder if it's because I'm not in top physical form to get him off. I'm not overweight or anything and he said he just always had trouble coming like that. In addition, since I know it's not doing much for him, I start to lose interest in being on top and get self conscious. I like mutuality so I find myself falling into his narrower sexual position preference. To make matters worse, my desire for total participation (voice/sound and image/vision) are left (slowly becoming bitterly) unsatisfied as I cannot see much while he is behind me and not saying anything.

A few facts: He is very large. I like it but I do not like how after being with someone of his size I notice that he's stretched my vaginal skin a bit. It's only slight and he says he didn't notice but I do.

Question: Can I train my man? If so, how?? If I can't, how can I make this better for myself??

Am I being unreasonable???

Thanks for reading this!!!