Afraid of having sex..

I really think I have an actual sex phobia.. I'm 20 and a virgin. At first my idea was like 'well I want my first time to actually mean something with someone I love'. Well that time has come, and I'm so iffy about it- I'm like obsessed with the horror stories of pain. My muscles are also really tight from lack of eh.. stimulation 'up there'. I'm not sure what to do, should I talk to someone, or get a book or what?