Re: feeling extremely ill
Dear Jackie,
Although your future appears to be bleak to you, it isn't . Having released such a large stone shows that this is where the problem is, and there is more where it came from. When I was 16 my life was just as hopeless, but when I thought it ended, I received insights that helped me turn it around. You can do the same. A wise God wouldn't interfere in the affairs of humans, for the problems they face are their own making, from previois lives and this life, and taking away the lessons and oportunities to grow out of weaknesses would be not in their favor. God isn't outsdie you. God is just as much you, in you, and in everyone and everything else, regardless whether there is the awareness of God's presence or not. Not even an atom could move from a to b without the presence of and energy of God. God is omnipresent field. The deepest part of you is God also. We humans tend to deny our divine nature (children of God) and when things are going wrong because of this self-denial (due to fear, guilt shame, etc.) we look for God outside ourselves to save us. One day you will find out that the greatest challenges in your life were the greatest blessings and opportunities. We are here to grow from our weaknesses, to grow out of all self-denial and assume the true Selfhood that we are. You are on that path, too. The path can be hard and stony at times, and the cross you carry feel very heavy. In time, you will find that you no longer need wear that cross.
Step by step, with patience and preserverence you will move through this. You are not a victim of bad luck, you have chosen this to develop courage, trust in yourself, and to heal yourself so that you can help heal others. With each new cleanse, you release more of the fear that is trapped inside. The whole world is being challenged right now, to release old fears and limitations. We are all in this together.
Blessings,
Andreas