I don't think think the medical fraternity know enough about herpes contagion.
My wife never had any symptoms and didn't know she had it but she passed it on to me and I had 5 outbreaks in the first 6 months.
All the allopathic doctors I speak to give a different view.
Some have a vested interest in pushing drugs (which made me ill when I tried them).Others play it down and say it's just like any other kind of virus so eat/live healthily and live with it.
Some think it isn't contagious unless it is active, but if you don't have tingling/ burning how do you know?
The best advice is to use a condom, although this isn't guaranteed. I can tell you that you are exceptionally lucky not to have the symptoms which are debilitating. Does your wife to be know you have it? Ultimately honesty will make the system more manageable