Transmission when no outbreaks

Hi! My boyfriend & I have been sexually active for over 5 years. The problem is that his ex-wife swears he gave her herpes. He says he's been tested, and, it was negative. I honestly trusted him on this. He told me he had to use the results in court during their divorce, because, she tried to use this against him. He had never had an outbreak before we met, he says, so, they performed a blood test. He has never had an outbreak since we have been together, nor I. In fact, I have never had anything weird happen down there, not even a yeast infection. We have had a child in this time as well. We do not use protection, because we are exclusively with each other.

My questions are ~
1. Is it possible for him to have herpes without an outbreak for over 5 years.
2. Is it possible for us to be active for so long, and him not spread it to me, even without an outbreak? I know it is possible to spread without an outbreak, and, this seems like a long time to test that theory.
3. Do you think that he could have spread it to her through oral sex & having a cold sore? I am not sure if she has HSV-1 or HSV-2. He did not know it was possible to spread herpes with a cold sore until I told him, so, he wonders now if that is what happened. I do know that she had to have surgery a couple years ago to remove sores because it had spread very badly inside of her, this is what she says anyway. Could one cold sore possibly have caused all of this?